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galadriel vs. leia - whitney avalon lyrics

[announcer]
princess rap battle: galadriel versus leia! let the rap battle begin!

[galadriel]
one does not simply walk into this fight
i’m the baddest b-tch in middle earth, the lady of light
i look better in white, you should flee from my sight
i’ll strike you down like obi-wan cause i’m colder than carbonite
you battle me? you’re not strong enough
a human break an elf? you don’t live long enough
you better listen hard through those donuts in your hair
by the time i end this line you will love me and despair

[leia]
calm down grandma, you’re ugly when you’re mad
showing off your dark side? you remind me of my dad
what a strong female character obsessed with a ring
and you had to send a group of men to fix everything
when sauron took over you hid in a tree
i led the rebel alliance and we saved the whole galaxy
when i am done with you you will be nothing but a crater
my words explode like bombs, i’m a verbal detonator

[galadriel]
what have your films had, like thirteen re-edits?

[leia]
well, most of your runtime is spent on the credits
we’re on movie number seven while you’re still on your sixth

[galadriel]
yes, but unlike you we don’t pretend that three don’t exist

[leia]
you’re like a stormtrooper ‘cuz your shots never hit
i wore one gold bikini and the world lost its sh-t
i’ll rap faster, outlast her, outcl-ss her, surp-ss her
i’m a master with a blaster, you’re a renn faire disaster
i walk in the sky while you’re stuck on the land
just a hippie hobbit-humper, unblinking and bland
no light saber needed to take you out
search your feelings, you will forfeit this bout

[galadriel]
i will… never give in to your jedi mind, trick
and after jabba’s eager tongue you should know when you’re l1cked
my lyrics so wet i’m like a rhyming typhoon
how’s alderaan doing? sorry, too soon?
i see things that were, things that are, things that may be
i’m fully operational, it’s over, baby
you shall not p-ss, challenge another
you can kiss my -ss, pretend it’s your brother

- whitney avalon lyrics

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