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i'll repair for you ( a theme for home improvement ) - weird al yankovic lyrics

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so you got dry rot
and your water pressure’s weak
the trash compactor’s broke
your roof has sprung a leak
you just found out your toilet’s overflowed
and your smoke detector’s smoking
and your heater’s gonna explode
but

i’ll repair for you
when your roof starts to fall
i’ll repair for you
all the cracks in your wall
i’ll repair for you
every nail, bolt, and screw

your washer’s busted
and your faucet drips all night
you’ve got some termites
with a healthy appet-te
well, have no fear, i’ll patch up every hole
and i’m licensed, and i’m bonded
even se habla español
so

i’ll repair for you
when your doorkn-bs are loose
i’ll repair for you
when your plunger’s no use
i’ll repair for you
with some caulk and hot glue

i am prepared to tackle
all kinds of paint and sp-ckle
you got a leaky shower
i’ll be there in an hour
with stucko, bricks, and plaster
i am a jedi master
we’ll help you through your crisis
check out our low, low prices too

your floors are sagging
and your plumbing’s shot
well, if you don’t mind my hair b-tt crack
every time that i squat
then

i’ll repair for you
anything that you need
i’ll repair for you
and the work’s guaranteed
i’ll repair for you
i’ll rewire it too

i’ll repair for you (3x)
every nail, bolt, and screw

- weird al yankovic lyrics

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