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be kind to animals - watkin tudor jones jr. lyrics

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“each of you, must distinguish for himself. between the scenes of cold reality, and those of pure illusion”

they call me
old mcdonald, i live on a farm
yo
i don’t even have a burglar alarm
i got a big gun
sometimes i shoot little birds
just for fun
so don’t be stepping on my property son
got my wife, three boys, and little girl
until last week
i didn’t have a care in the world
till little johnny started acting crazy
cuz poppa shot daisy
i was like, “hush little baby!
don’t cry yo, just chill
god made animals for us to k!ll”
i said, “stop crying dammit, just stop acting dumb!
where you think hamburgers come from?”

for that night johnny ate something dead
so that night the boogeyman came out from under his bed
and zapped inside his head
his eyes began to glow red
and this is what he said
(“hey johnny, how you doin’ sonny?
what smells so yummy?
got something bl–dy in your tummy!
don’t cry you big fat dummy!
you can’t call your mommy
cuz you’re sleeping
when we come creeping!
they gonna nibble your toes!
while i stick my long tongue up your nose!
then all my sick little friends and i
are gonna sing scary songs till you cry

be kind to animals, they’re our friends!
all obsessed with the taste of flesh

once upon a time
there stood the magnificent house
up on the hill
over looking the sea
the garden was as pretty as can be
and no doubt g
the lord of the house was very happy
however, one day he
decided to embark on a long journey
for his dreams had revealed to him
magic far away lands
and he began making plans
he knew the long road ahead would put him to the test
so he crossed his heart, and hoped for the best
only upon his return would he rest
and so began his adventurous quest
oh
and after long word got around
that the lord of the house on the hill was out of town
and so
three wicked men h-ll bound
kicked down the door to see what they could score
yo they chilled out
at the lords temple
for how many moons? ha!
living like kings
helping themselves to the finest of things
the hands of the bad guys
bore phat diamond rings
while unbeknown
to the three wicked men
the lord of the house returned again

“what the h-ll’s going on!?” yelled he
“best deflee, or yee shall feel the touch of my steel!”
out the windows they fled
struck by dread
back to the land of the dead
the moral of the story, your body is your temple
so yo, act like you know

be kind to animals, they’re our friends!

“man turns animal, for the erotic pleasures of women
and men.”

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