bourgeois beleaguered - viranesir lyrics
this is the sound of your childhood dying
you could not succeed in taking its hand through life
you had to earn your living and become a stone
please don’t make kids on your own
you will probably die alone
and forget the sound of your crying
remember those lonely years?
don’t they seem scarier than your current loneliness?
those you hated and had to punish
aren’t they who you ran to?
would it be better or worse if they died?
would it be better or worse if i die?
why do you still back off from life?
are you afraid of losing your childhood?
would it be better or worse if ruhan died?
would it be better or worse if she were alive?
look at me, i recreate my life every five years
and curse the old one as something terrible
then when i am finished with one
i return to the previous one
always on the search for home
be it in the lights of a café, or the corner of someone’s mouth
as soon as i catch that feeling
i walk away from it
everything is because of fear
fear planted by my mother
in whose house i write this poem
when will i be set free?
everything is because of fear
fear fertilized by my father
couldn’t he just flush me down?
will i never be set free?
your life is the mistake of your situation
oh how lonely i am in this bourgeois trap
this is perhaps the loneliest place on earth
no respite, no respite at all
maybe i should move out and think about things
like i did for five years
and end up depressed in front of the computer
no one can understand my pain
how can they understand his pain?
smiley face
british escape
would it work?
do i know anything outside my sh*ll?
do i know anything at all?
can i ever make it work?
am i going to k!ll myself?
will i succeed in ending this pain?
what would i do if there were no black metal
as soundtrack for my self*pity
would i be better off?
will i never be better?
smiley face
british consulate
spending time
with a good friend
spending time away
take time
take sh*t
don’t do anything
just be pretty
in your room
in your room
in your room
spend a lifetime
in your room
in your room
no one deserves to be desecrated
by their past
no one deserves
to live
take my life
like i took it from you
what do you want of me
why are we still so afraid of change?
why am i so alone?
why do i remember only bad things?
why do i only remember?
why when i look at my past
and compare it to today
i feel like it was good
when in fact it was sh*t
why when i look at my past
and compare it to future
i feel like it was sh*t
when in fact it was okay
although i believe only the stupid
think they know for certain
i am absolutely certain
that i see through people
everyone is so predictable
everyone is so basic
everyone is so boring
everyone is evil
i hate people like i can not tell you
i do not cry when people die
because i do not feel sorry for them
i envy them
those who linger
and make kids just because
should die instantly
rather than waiting
slowly waiting to die
slowly waiting to die
life is slowly waiting to die
i feel alive in the bottom of this sea
life is waiting to die
life is waiting to die
life is waiting to die
life is waiting to die
when you are already dead
nothing really matters
you can not even look back at all those empty years
you get scared off of your loneliness
when all worthwhile memories
are intense traumas
and you ask yourself
how long till you catch the now?
when you know in your head
that it is all in your hands
and you also know
that you can never reach it
when your only friends
are f*cked up losers
time and time again
f*cked up losers
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