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pornhub anthem (contest entry) - toothpick tommy lyrics

[verse 1:]
welcome to p-rnhub, worlds biggest p-rn site
where you can c-m….and leave full of delight
you’re gonna explode like shaken up sprite
but it’s all right, there’s kleenex in sight!!
and it’s free!! it’s not run by greed
they’ve got everything you need to satisfy your needs:
lesbian and hd, -n-l, and ebony
fetish, fisting, babes, striptease
from bondage to creampies, big d-cks and orgies
latina, hardcore, whatever gets you h-rny
and for the ladies, they’ve got everything and more
female friendly videos, they don’t label you a wh0r-
and i know there are girls that like like the same as men
so go on and do your thing girl, outlast the men!!
and g-ys, i didn’t forget about you
they’ve got twinks, and hunks, and romantic stuff too
and h-ll i’ll admit, i’m not ashamed to say
i’ve even strayed over to p-rnhub g-y
but my main forte is “lesbian m-ssage”
that sh-t gets me crazy like seeing a mirage

[chorus:]
i’m watchin p-rnhub, all night, all day
cause i know a pretty lady ain’t comin my way

i’m watchin p-rnhub………
i’m watchin p-rnhub

[verse 2:]
it’s the life man, one cl1ck, hard d-ck
got some time to k!ll?? rub one off right quick
all these great big -sses and great big t-tties
plus you can meet hot locals in your city
threesomes; that’s the best with both girls
sh-m-l-s; now that’s the best of both worlds
if rappin was w-nking then i could’ve already mastered this
too busy spending my nights with all of these actresses
dani daniels, celeste starr, shyla jennings
these ladies and more guarantee happy endings
i even have it saved on my phone
so i don’t have to wait till i’m home alone

[chorus:]
i’m watchin p-rnhub, all night, all day
cause i know a pretty lady ain’t comin my way

i’m watchin p-rnhub………
i’m watchin p-rnhub

[verse 3:]
but on a serious note, it provides a safe place
to explore the depths of this great s-x sp-ce
what i mean is if you feel a certain fantasy
you can safely explore your own s-xuality
because of this, no risk of pregnancy
and you don’t have to worry about std’s
or feeling ashamed if you went and got laid
then realized your fantasies and feelings had changed
and it’s a beautiful thing more people should understand
it goes a lot deeper than just using your hand

- toothpick tommy lyrics

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