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porcelain - tonedeff lyrics

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[produced by tonedeff]

[hook]
days p-ss and time goes on and on
you might think my skin was strong enough, but
there’s something you don’t understand
i’m porcelain, i’m porcelain

[bridge]
knowin’ if i could give you the sky and also the sea
but i don’t think there’s one thing in this world that’ll make you notice me
cause you can wield that sword in any direction you d-mn well please
but you don’t understand that my heart is in your hands
and i’m beggin’ you not to squeeze

[verse 1]
i was ruined in the 7th grade, the pain never changed or went away
the memory’s ingrained like it was yesterday
they’re tellin’ me i’m crazed, because i blessed her name
a steady gaze to sweat her frame, if life is just a play, then she was center stage
i sent her letter pages on a daily basis, that her friends trashed in waste bins
so if she asks there’s no way to trace this
she was reigning queen of junior high and i was faceless
painted bangs and bracelets and even looked graceful in plated braces
i hate to say this, but my aim was wasted
so i trained my heart for 7 years while she remained in basics
leadin’ the same parade of babes to places
swearin’ i held a sp-ce in her heart, yet every semester she’d vainly replace it
yet, i waited and displayed my patience
even offered statements of positive advice in her cases of shaky situations
but, she never -ssociated me with hip relations
with bated breath i withstood the breakage, like porcelain

[hook]

[verse 2]
with my hormones racin’, prayin’ a for a date on summer vacation
around the time when your body is under renovation
you know when nothin’ really fits?
and the girls get bolder, and start lookin’ for older affiliates
i hold a silly wish in my mind that she’d willingly kiss these lips
but i won’t get frisky, i get the feeling she’d diss me
i’m still in a risky, position – itching to hit a decision
to muster up the ambition to make the proposition
desperation became my religion
the same way you envision cynics finding jesus caged in a prison
visitin’ hours consisted of english lit and diction
history quizzes on christians and mr. richard nixon
transfixed in her smile like the other fifty guys
she hypnotized, guess i’m another stickler for pretty eyes
i minimized my obsession, never made the confession
even evaded her presence at our graduation procession
it was a decision i later regretted
wonderin’ what i could have said and would it have swept her away if i said it?
step and repeat and edit – my thoughts clashed
but i regained my lost chance the very day that we crossed paths again
i revelled in the opportunity, asked her to go dancing
baskin’ in this confidence that was new to me
and it worked beautifully! a wild night became a quiet ride home
as i broke the silence her eyes roamed
7 years of frustration then hit her ears with abrasion
as i laced her with my tale of l-st, tears and antic-p-tion
her reaction was a face of fakeness
told me she was flattered, but within a tone lacking any amazement
it seemed she’d heard it all before
i realized then her popularity is what i wanted her for
i tried to be strong as she hopped out the door
but even the hardest hearts break when they’re dropped to the floor
like porcelain

[hook]

[interlude]
that’s love…
so hard to let go sometimes
but you gotta move on
or you can break your own heart

[hook]

[outro]
cause in the end
we’re all just little kids with scarred hearts
from little kids who think they’re bigger than they really are
just little boys with scarred hearts
from little girls who think they’re older than they really are
just little girls with scarred hearts
from little boys who think they’re older than they really are
just little kids with scarred hearts
from other little kids

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