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learning trust - to love and grow lyrics

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for years all i wanted was a box to call my own
a place where i’d exist and think
and i could believe in anything i wanted to
but now that i have it cupped inside my hands
it seems the accommodations are more scarce than i had planned
because only i fit in to my plans
only i fit in
now i feel more alone than i have ever been

so how do i tap into the hope
i know is in me when my heart is emptying all of the words
that i’ve been feeling
remind me how it hurts
to feel like i’ve been doing nothing with my life
and even though i’m trying
small accomplishments don’t seem to mean enough

when my heart is in my stomach and my stomach is underfoot
i know i need to get over this
i can’t spend the rest of my life writing poems about being sick
god knows our problems aren’t easily fixed
but within our reach is medicine
it’s up to us to taste and see it
we were not meant to exist like this

i’m not happy where i am
but i don’t know where to go
i concentrate on everything
that makes me feel alone
i’m losing faith in conversation
i’m losing purpose for my plans

open up and let go

- to love and grow lyrics

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