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miracle, pt. 3 - tim minchin lyrics

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[mrs wormwood]
oh, my undercarriage doesn’t feel quite normal
my skin looks just revolting in this foul, fluorescent light
and this gown is nothing like the semi-formal
semi-spanish gown
i should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight!

i should be dancing the tarentella
qui mon fella italiano
not dressed in hospital cotton
with an owchie . . . front bottom
and this –

[doctor]
miracle!

[mrs wormwood]
horrible –

[doctor]
miracle!

[mrs wormwood]
smelly little –

[doctor]
the most beautiful miracle i have ever seen!

[mr wormwood]
i can’t find his frank ‘n’ beans!

[doctor]
ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely

[all kids]
my mummy says i’m a miracle

[doctor]
the chances of existence almost infinitely small

[all kids]
my daddy says i’m his special little guy

[doctor]
the most common thing in life is life –

[all kids]
hup, two, four, free!

[doctor]
and yet, every single life
every new life
is a miracle!
miracle!
miracle!

[all]
my mummy says i’m a miracle
one look at my face and it’s plain to see
ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord
it’s been clear there’s no peer for a miracle like me
my mummy says i’m a miracle
that i’m as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball
you can be all cynical
but it’s a truth empirical
there’s never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as . .

[matilda]
my mummy says i’m a lousy little worm
my daddy says i’m a bore
my mummy says i’m a jumped-up little germ
that kids like me should be against the law
my daddy says i should learn to shut my pie-hole
no one like a smart-mouthed girl like me
mum says i’m a good case for population control
dad says i should watch more tv

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