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my first christmas as a woman - the vandals lyrics

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with christmas upon us it’s time to be honest
and follow my dreams and to face
a life of delusion and gender confusion
no longer will be the case

i never wanted army men or basketb-lls,
i only wanted pantyhose and barbie dolls
and dressing up in mother’s clothing.

my whole life i’ve been feeling only feminine
it always seemed so useless trying to be a man
now that’s a ghost of christmas past

now it feels like the very first time,
’cause it’s going to be the very first time,
that christmas feels right to me.

and i know that i’m looking good
just like a real girl should-
it’s my first christmas as a woman

a doctor reconstructed my genitals
and now i’m waiting underneath the mistletoe
for a guy who could love a girl like me.

i took the hormones and i got my br–sts
this season’s gonna be the best to me.

i won’t have to tuck it behind me
since i got my brand new v-g-n-
it’s my first christmas as a woman.

chop if off! chop if off! chop if off!
my p-n-s, chop it off
it’s no use to me.
cut it off!
chop it off! chop it off!
my p-n-s, cut it off so i can finally be
a woman…

now i’m finally happy ’cause i made my goal
to be a post operation transs-xual.
now i’m a pretty lady

now it feels like the very first time,
’cause it’s going to be the very first time,
that christmas feels right to me.

’cause i know that i’m looking good
just like a real girl should-
it’s my first christmas as a woman

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