minecraft vs lego (destructive ending) - the stupendium & dan bull lyrics
[intro: the stupendium]
it’s the battle of the builders! bricks v. blocks!
in the red corner, everybody’s favorite precision*molded master builder, the lego man!
and in the blue corner, the polygonal pilgrim, the right*angled adventurer, minecraft steve!
[verse 1: dan bull]
you might recognize me from the world’s biggest video game
they call me steve * did they even give you a name?
i’m the new kid on the block, bringing new blocks to the kids
from the digital underground, don’t need boxes and lids
i’m freestyling lines that are dropping you dead
your hair’s the only thing coming off the top of your head
you’re still under construction * can’t be having much fun
amidst a world of bricks in which your fists can’t even clutch one
you’re a bygone era bargain bin man, your time’s passed
your style’s child’s play, make way for minecraft!
my blocks are rocks, logs, quartz, and lapis
while yours are plastic… and that’s it
check my stats, look, i’m k!lling it on youtube
i can fell a forest with my fists * what can you do?
i’ll build an obsidian tomb and lock you up in there
mind you, i could do that with some tupperware
[verse 2: the stupendium]
not fair to square raps against this cube
no joints, i still articulate better than you
i’m a classic, an icon, with style to boot
’cause no matter what i’m wearing, it’s a three*piece suit
i have sparked imaginations, every kid in every nation
on and on for generations, you can’t stop what i’m creating
check my sp*ce station, no tekkit installation
you’re low*res, homeless, no chance of overtaking
i’m a timeless line of iconic design
while you melt kids’ minds one block at a time
for centuries we left child labour behind
you’ve essentially trapped them all back in the mines!
won’t be fooled by the blocks that you got
without a modpack, all you’re rocking is rocks
so have fun as you fumble in the dirt
want to step to me? you’ll see how much that hurts!
[chorus: nicepeter]
you got two rappers, but the battle’s six*sided
boxes in the ring, taking swings at the prize, it’s
apparently imperative we get it decided
which brick clique gets kids excited?
[verse 3: dan bull]
gather ’round, everybody, drum roll please
and see the freak with two bumholes! jeez!
if you come for steve, then your loot gets dropped
i’m rocking more blocks than a rubik’s shop
look, the truth is, i don’t want to keep dissing
but you’re useless soon as there’s one piece missing
i’m unlimited fun*bringing don of construction
i worked it out myself, you just follow instructions!
i brave caves for days, digging diamonds, capping creepers
sending spiders to the grave, can you keep up?
nah! i can end an enderman while he renders in
don’t send for the avengers, marvel, i’m assembling
you can’t even take your trousers down without dismembering!
now we’re entering survival mode
you’re just gathering dust, so here’s the final blow
[verse 4: the stupendium]
trample me? you’ll need more than a horse
’cause you’re tangling with a toy box tour*de*force
i may be a plaything but i break the mould
every day, three hundred thousand of me get sold
heard of overwatch? did you hope to contend?
’cause we’re over notch, yeah, your trend’s at an end
you overshot if you came to depend
on the whims of the net just to get dividends
your phenomenon topped all the charts, it’s true
but they dropped off faster than notch dropped you
a decade ago, you were top of the views
but you’d still be at the bottom if it wasn’t for pewds
sticks and stones may break my bones
but they aren’t intimidating when they’re all your own
want to get a brick*slap from some bric*a*brac? better pack
your bits into your zip while i’m building me a throne
[chorus: nicepeter]
you got two rappers, but the battle’s six*sided
boxes in the ring, taking swings at the prize, it’s
apparently imperative we get it decided
which brick clique gets kids excited?
[verse 5: epiclloyd]
listen up! i’ve had just about enough of this
insufferable blubbering from rubble and a couple bricks!
meet the product of all that you’ve accomplished!
i’m the new stud in this construction triumvirate!
an out of date java game cobbled together
and a pathetic little relic that’s desperate for relevance!
the best of both your elements, expensive as i’m elegant!
playtime paradigm? i just left you in some sediment!
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