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how to be a country star - the statler brothers lyrics

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there’s questions we’re always hearing every where we go
like how do i cut a record or get on a country show
well, it takes more than just ambition and three chords on an old guitar
there’s a few more things you ought to learn to be a country star

you got to learn to sing like waylon or pick like jerry reed
yodel like jeannie shepard, write songs like tom t
put a cry in your voice like haggard, learn spanish like johnny r
whisper like bill anderson and you’ll be a country star

play piano like ronnie mil sap or gilly or jerry lee
yo-yo like roy acuff or talk plain like ralph emery
growl like conway twitty, get a red, white and blue guitar
build a swimming pool like webb did and you’ll be a country star

be tall like sonny james is, tell jokes like minnie pearl
or be short like jimmy d-ckens or play five-string like earl
get a hip band like willie, learn to stutter like m-mel
get a cap like roy clark wore or a voice like barbara mandrel

be rich like eddy arnold, say you’re makin’ more than you are
get a gimmick like charley pride got and you’ll be a country star

but if you have no talent and you’re not a male
if you’re built somewhat like dolly or have a face like crystal g-yle
come back stage and ask for harold, phil, don or lou
and we’ll see you get auditioned for the statler brothers review

- the statler brothers lyrics

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