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welcome to mountport - the offical cast of mountport the musical lyrics

[narrator, spoken]
lights up on a small new england town
it’s spring but winter has left a hint of dew upon the air
a local newsie shouts today’s headlines…

[newsie, spoken]
extra! extra! read all about it!
the fish are gone!
where’d they go? i don’t know
that’s not my job because i don’t write the paper
i just distribute it

[narrator, spoken]
that is so funny, given what i have next
a fisherman hogs their catch of the day!

[fisherman, spoken]
augh, i got a whole batch of nothing
’cause they’re all gone!
it’s just water out there!

[narrator, spoken]
two old women gossip on a nearby porch…

[old women #1]
did you hear about the fish?
[old women #2]
did you hear about gladys?
sorry, your things sounds bigger

[old women #1]
no, i hеard that gladys stole the fish

[old women #2]
oh, right, okay, so it was the samе thing

[old women #1]
gladys went out on a schooner and caught all the fish

[old women #2]
i heard it was tuna she caught on the

[old women #1/old women #2]
schooner

[narrator, spoken]
welcome to the mountain/seaside town of mountport!
how is that geologically possible you ask?
i, uh, theater, i suppose
and like so many musicals, ours begins with a group number
to introduce you, the audience, to town
in a scene, that will eventually turn into a song
from the official cast recording
i give you: welcome to mountport
[mountport residents, spoken]
good morning!
(good morning!)
well, h*llo, h*llo there!
(h*llo!)
oh, hey, uh, down there!

[unnamed resident #1, spoken]
ay, ay timothy!

[timothy, spoken]
yeah?

[unnamed resident #1, spoken]
you’re not allowed in the street anymore, you know why?

[timothy, spoken]
but, why?

[unnamed resident #1, spoken]
on account of the crimes!

[timothy, spoken]
okay, i guess i’ll go back indoors!

[unnamed resident #2, spoken]
oh, it’s another foggy day
where the ocean marine layer gets stuck in our mountain range!
[unnamed resident #1, spoken]
that’s right!

[unnamed resident #2, spoken]
i wouldn’t have it any other way!

[mountport residents]
oh, the mountains over there
next to the sea!
how can that be?
how can that be?
well the mountains stretch from the sky right down to the sea
how can that be?
(like physically?)
how can that be?
but when you live in mountainport, you don’t ask many questions
like, to say this is impossible, throw out that suggestion!
yes, the literal name is “mountainport”
and that’s what we’re about!
but because we’re very busy
very very busy
we shortern it to “mountport”!
the mountain is right next to the sea…
how can that be?
how can that be?
how can…
(how can…)

[mountport residents, spoken]
don’t ask me!
don’t ask me!

[timothy, spoken]
you can ask me!

[unnamed resident #1, spoken]
get back inside!

[timothy, spoken]
okay!

- the offical cast of mountport the musical lyrics

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