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laugh - the lulls in traffic lyrics

[verse 1]
look at my face, does it still look the same?
you should know
you used to feel it every day
i’m defeated ’cause time has eroded
and the things that i’ve chosen to remember are over, over
but it’s water under the bridge, sand at the edge of the ocean
i stand alone hoping still but floating
must feel better
how do you do it?
how have you done it in the past?
i used to laugh at you but now your wings are laughing right back
can’t grasp you, can’t ask you to reconsider
’cause you already planted the seeds for winter
it’ll be back again to safely inundate me
blatantly painting, maybe on dream chasing
hating me ’til the king himself come around paying me, right
delusions of justice or karma coming through for  me
arm in arm, you and me, i’d k!ll myself for that, for happenstance
or for our half romance to at least come to a full finish
what’s there to do but laugh?
but i can honestly say that i forgot to do that

[verse 2]
when the sun’s out i hate you, but by moonlight i love you
i miss you
every night is a struggle
when i was with you, i forgot who i was and things made sense
now my time is spent engaged in preemptive defense
building a fence around the cloud that hangs over my head
’cause my joy is shattered gl-ss and my laugh is pretend
so pretend you never  met me
wish i could do the same
because i sold tomorrow short for a new today

[verse 3]
i fell past the tree line, past the street
and under the subway, my past repeats
my last reprieve is  the grief that fights on
rock bottom, limestone, spotlight, i am alone
ready to speak but my words lost their purity
invisible disease that is now blurring the line between real and fake
i felt safe when i was with you
you’d light up and laugh when i kissed you

[verse 4]
it seems happiness is an illusion, and you’ve mastered it
i can tell, it shows up in every photograph that i have
plastered up on my wall, subtracted
back from when you still loved me, past tense
and if i failed at life but made you smile it was worth it
hypnotized on the surface level
but a kiss from your lips is worthless
h-llo, wish i could take it back
i’m sorry, didn’t mean to make you laugh

- the lulls in traffic lyrics

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