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"look what you made me do" parody - the key of awesome lyrics

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[taylor, sung]
i’m actually not mad
our blood is not that bad
but it pays to exaggerate these
petty high school feuds

you remember that one time
you cut in the lunch line?
no? well, neither do i
but i need to be p-ssed at you

i’m merciless but on the surface
i look so demure
time to admit i’m a pop music cersei lannister
screw katy perry
i was barely ever friends with her
got a pot that i love to stir

i don’t think about you
that’s why i wrote this tune
and made an epic video
to show you i’m aloof
all the things i do
are calculated moves
that’s why i’ll never ever ever
date non-famous dudes

you stole dancers from me
who were yours originally
i wrote songs when i was 15
that had more maturity

[katy perry, spoken]
than this!

[taylor, spoken]
it’s hard to keep a straight face
when i say i don’t love drama
don’t touch my -ss ’cause i’ll sue your -ss
and take your dolla
oh yeah you made this bish famous
or so you claim
don’t know what you made but i made you insane

when i ask for a diet c-ke
i want it with a lime
and don’t make eye contact with me
or you could lose an eye
i got my b-tch pants on
and i must say they fit me fine
p-ss me off
’cause i need more rhymes!

my new -ssistant june
you would think she was two
last week this dipsh-t
brought me miso soup without a spoon
i’m just playing with you
yor crying face is eww
wipe off that snot
before it drips on my new jimmy choo’s

why did my new -ssistant try to sabotage me?
unless she’s secretly working for katy
my sh-t list has gotten’ longer than war and peace
my friend list is a post-it note that says “me”
who would like to join me for an after shoot drink?

[guy, spoken]
ohh, my grandma died, ummm

[girl, spoken]
i need 12 hours of sleep

[taylor, sung]
you have all inspired my upcoming lp

[guy, spoken]
really?

[taylor, sung]
it’s about every piece of sh-t who crossed me!

[taylor, spoken]
i’m sorry the old taylor can’t crumb to the phone-
oh, shoot!
i’m sorry the phone taylor can’t crumb to the-
ahh! why do i keep saying crumb?
third time’s the charm!
i’m sorry, the old taylor can’t –

[delivery man, spoken]
excuse me, i got a delivery for a taylor swift –

[taylor]
aghrhhh!!

[delivery man, spoken]
look what you made me do!

[taylor, sung]
cr-p!
well, now i’m all alone
who will pick up the phone?
and help me choose my next target to musically bemoan
my writing partner fled
i’ll steal from right said fred
i bet those one-hit wonders aren’t too s-xy for a check

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