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pure poppycock - the gregory brothers lyrics

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[nigel farage]
you have the charisma of a damp rag!

[frank mcgee]
damp rag!

[nigel farage]
you have the appearance of a bank clerk!

[frank mcgee]
bank clerk!

[nigel farage]
who are you? i’d never heard of you!

[frank mcgee]
eat my poo!

[nigel farage]
nobody in europe had ever heard of you!
but i have no doubt that it’s your intention
to be the quiet -ss-ssin of european democracy
perhaps that’s because you come from belgium
which of course, is pretty much a non-country
we don’t know you, we don’t want you!
the sooner you’re put out to gr-ss, the better!
we don’t like you, we don’t want you!

[frank mcgee]
our logic and reason have proved you wrong!

[bølverk]
go back to douchebagistan where you belong!

[frank mcgee]
don’t make me have to start world war iii!

[bølverk]
bring it on, these guns are wmd!

[nigel farage]
we don’t know you, we don’t want you!
we don’t like you, we don’t want you!

[katie couric]
last month, comedian bill cosby
was surprised to read that he died

[joel madden]
how can he read if he’s dead?

[katie couric]
chief justice john roberts
was the last to know he resigned

[joel madden]
maybe he should check his head

[katie couric]
all of those stories, of course, are pure poppyc-ck
that proliferated online

[joel madden]
i do it all the time
makin’ up shit is so sublime

[katie couric]
but that of course is little solace for the reader
who simply wants to surf the web
without getting pulled under by a riptide of lies

[joel madden]
you can’t protect the web from -ssholes like me, shorty

[katie couric]
truth can rip through cyberspace as quickly as lies
bloggers gnaw at new information like piranhas in a pool

[joel madden]
don’t play me for a fool
you know as well as i
we’re both getting owned by the

[katie couric & joel madden]
rip-riptide of lies
pulled under by a rip-riptide of lies
pure poppyc-ck
pure poppyc-ck
i want to surf, surf the web
without getting pulled under
by a rip-riptide of lies, lies, lies

[glenn beck]
you hit on a guy at a wedding

[eric m-ssa]
i-i so-

[glenn beck]
explain that one first

[eric m-ssa]
okay, so we’re at a wedding, new year’s eve
everyone had too much to drink
there were 300 people there
i went with a bridesmaid, danced with her
i grabbed a bachelor
now they’re sayin’ i groped a male staffer
yeah, i did

[glenn beck]
um

[eric m-ssa]
yeah, yeah, yeah

[evan & andrew gregory]
a manly back-rub
just a back rub!

[eric m-ssa]
we all live together
all the bachelors and me

[evan & andrew gregory]
naked in the tub

[eric m-ssa]
you can take anything out of context

[evan & andrew gregory]
huggin’!

[eric m-ssa]
you can take anything out of context

[evan & andrew gregory]
scrubbin’!

[eric m-ssa]
you can take anything out of context

[evan & andrew gregory]
rubbin’ and humpin!

[eric m-ssa]
yeah!

[evan & andrew gregory]
ticklin’ and jumpin’!

[eric m-ssa]
yeah, yeah!
i tickled him ’till he couldn’t breathe
then four guys jumped on me
it’s my 50th birthday

[glenn beck]
whether you’re telling the truth or not
an avalanche is coming your way
an avalanche of lies

[sarah gregory]
pulled under by an avalanche of lies

[katie couric]
pure poppyc-ck

[joel madden]
pure poppyc-ck

[glenn beck]
whether you’re telling the truth or not

[sarah gregory]
you’re guaranteed to get caught

[glenn beck & sarah gregory]
in an avalanche of lies

[michael gregory]
m-ssa staffers!
droppin’ a st. bernard of truth
but we already drank the brandy
my boss tickles me like a true g
he straddles me so masculine
no stoppin’ when i’m askin’ him
when he cootchie-coo my armpits, i’m a goner
tryna pretend that i don’t notice his b-n-r!
tryna distract him with headlines from china
he just drop his drawers and pull out his vagina

[outro]
autotune the news
autotune the news
everything sounds better autotune-

[glenn beck]
i think this is the first time i have wasted your time
and i apologize for that

[evan gregory]
whenever you hear the boss swaggerin’ down the hall
you know he gonna drop a double cup on your tennis b-lls

[michael gregory]
you have to be a soldier, a real man
to soothe a male staffer with the stroke from a tender hand

[evan gregory]
ain’t nothin’ wrong with a m-ssa m-ssage
when you’re in a chronic platonic quintuple menage

[michael gregory]
the entourage gripped in a bear hug that they can’t escape
tryna pretend they don’t notice when he ejacu-

[andrew gregory]
hey, hey!
over the line

[michael gregory]
which part?

- the gregory brothers lyrics

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