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wumbastic scholastic books - the earlobe brothers lyrics

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[verse 1]
so, when i go to the bookstore
lookin’ for a book for
a little white boy who got nothin’ to live for
lookin’ for that one shelf
for that brand in good health
educatin’ schools all over
inside this trump h-ll
when i say brand
i mean manufacturer
so check your facts-urer
because the brand i’m lookin’ fer
is

[chorus]
wumbastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books

[verse 2]
who cares when you’re in the morning
and you’re not done mourning
the death of your grandfather named norman
so you get a book
“how to grieve death,”
you open it up and it says
“you are extremely g-y”
i can not perceive
how much this book makes me
feel so much anger that i have to pee
what brand is it from?
i know you’ll guess it, so say it with me
or you’re extremely g-y

[chorus]
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books

[hook]
no offense
perfectly safe for children
don’t worry
look at the state that i’m in
i’m buyin’ books
for an unknown recipient
so look forward
and get swallowed by the cement

[chorus]
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic

[verse 4]
boo-ooooo-aaaah!
listen to me
i own you
listen to me
get a boat, ya
ride the water
get yo’ floaties so you can start to float-a
read that novel like you mean it
like an x-ray, yeah, i’m gonna screen it (if you know what i mean)
what i’m sayin’ is
this the planet sheen

[chorus]
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books

[conclusion]
‘one i’m reachin’ fo’
is this song to be o-
-ver that is, can you agree?
so for the sake of you and me
hit that final chorus so i can pee

[chorus]
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books
wumbastic scholastic
wumbastic scholastic books

[a choir harmonization by the international fraculoid choir]

- the earlobe brothers lyrics

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