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i hate being everything i swore i'd never become - the distance apart lyrics

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[verse 1]
i wanted to be loved without the sacrifice (of reciprocating)
(“i sentence you to life”) that’s what i heard
and i saw you standing there
staring at nothing and everything at once with
salt tasting tears like a waterfall running backwards
as i walked away (“hey, no, wait”)
your voice seemed sick, your eyes seemed weak
i can’t barely stand up straight
“i’m leaving”

[chorus]
your credit card saved up in my phone
twenty bucks and a book left behind
i got a shelf and it’s filled up with you
i fear i cannot hide

[verse 2]
another sunday and a feeling p-ss me by
(“i don’t feel so great, f-ck!”)
just try and close my eyes
(i’m too exposed) with a hole beneath my shirt
where my heart was supposed to be
but what should i do now when all strength has left me
and my lungs are running low (on oxygen? blood stained)
stone cold hands. i can’t see further from here so i’m leaving

[chorus]
your credit card saved up in my phone
twenty bucks and a book left behind
i got a shelf and it’s filled up with you
i fear i cannot hide

[spoken]
did you memorize these lines? well, i did
just like i did with your hair
and that small birthmark in the back of your thigh
what should i do when the wind blows your scent towards me?
i can’t help but hold my breath ’til i turn blue
i can’t help but run away from you
i wonder how things are looking like inside of your place or how it’s decorated..
i hate being everything i swore i would never become

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