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not in my league - sun city girls lyrics

that’s right fellas it’s your uncle jim speakin’
you know it’s a most difficult task to drink from my flask
i’ll plant you like a seed
you’re not in my league
alright, i’ll explain this, y’see?
i slaughtered souls back in china
y’know, while the widows sang “my clementina?”
i hacked away at limbs with a machete down those crowded streets of j. paul getty, guys
i bottled brain in rhodesia ‘cause those godd-mn british awoke with amnesia
i could spit blood on your family and still win an oscar or a grammy, guys
yeah, i led a team of twelve oxen movin’ poisonous toxins
down the rivers of chromium, runnin’ live plutonium
yeah, i played drums with napoleon
and i was a librarian at alexandria, guys
i sold some stolen marsupials with a three-headed possum to a gardener from zurich
one of those guys known for cultivating illegal blossoms
yeah, i rolled dice on the vests of dead presidents’ chests
with the money i won i purchased six gatlin guns, guys
i flew in the force with pazuzu and ceremonies of voodoo
pistol-whipped a federale and dumped him in the trunk of a masarati, you know
i tip-toed through the tulips, knee-high in kentucky horse corpses, sippin’ mint juleps
that’s right, there’s me, and you’re not
but you know, a badly perfumed woman has no future
i bet you didn’t know that
just be careful — you wouldn’t wanna get your d-ck cut off in public, now would ya?
i know you wouldn’t choose to get beheaded in front of the three million dollars sittin’ there at the altar
gettin’ the sh-t kicked out of you by your girlfiend around all your cronies
you better go into training, since you’re not respected at all by the ones who really matter
you can’t even hum along with any of the tunes, you know, so how can you play ’em?
that’s right
that’s right, you’re not in my league, guys
just accept it

- sun city girls lyrics

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