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dyin' day - steve vai lyrics

[instrumental]

the fire coma stories: “dyin’ day”

the room seemed ominously cold as he entered it. it was the bright blue ceiling and walls and the white linoleum floor that gave it the chill

all the hospital rooms he could ever remember had a similar feeling, cold like this one, but it was the sight of his dad laying on the bed that seemed to give the chill an edge. it made him feel uneasy. for the first time in his life he saw his dad helpless. it was frightening. his dad was always a beacon of strength, light and love. there was always a warm feeling of comfort that he felt when he saw his dad, but now, even at this early age he sensed what was happening. he knew his father was dying and he felt pain in his heart

the young boy slowly walked to the side of the bed and stared into his father’s face. his father’s lips were dry and cracked, his skin was pale but his face had a strange serenity to it. it was the calm and peacefulness in his father’s face that took the edge off the boy’s fear

then the big eyelids rose and the father stared into the face of his son

“come here, boy.” the gravelly voice fell out of his mouth

the boy moved toward the father and they clasped hands

“are you afraid?”, asked the father. the boy shook his head no. “well, that’s good.”

then the boy stuttered, “well, maybe a little.”

“well, let me tell you something, my son”, the father weakly went on. “i’m gonna tell you about the three happiest days of my life. the first one was the day i married your mom. we were very young then and your mom was so so beautiful. i can remember how nervous she was and how happy i was. i actually felt like i was walking on air. when you feel joy like that, you have no care in the world. i only hope you will know this joy someday

“and the next happiest day in my life was the first time i set eyes on you. i froze solid in my tracks and was overcome with a great feeling of such love and happiness that i could barely contain myself. you were divinely precious beyond my ability to grasp, and when i look at you now, i still feel that same way. to me, you are the most beautiful creature of all god’s creations. i only hope that someday you will know the same joy i feel when i look at you.”

tears filled the boy’s eyes and rolled down his cheeks while he sniffled. his mouth tensed and trembled

“and, the next happiest day of my life is today.”

a puzzled look came over the boy’s face

“you see son, this world is a place where we come to sort of take care of some business before we go back home for a while where we really belong. you know how it is when you come home from school and you’re almost home, and waiting for you at home are your mom and dad with open and loving arms? they’re waiting for you with love and happiness because they missed you when you were gone. it’s something like that.”

“but, i want to go with you,” the boy declared

“when you’re done taking care of business here and it’s your time, then you will move on also. but, for now, your mom needs you, and there are so many exciting happiest days in your life to come. i’m gonna be fine where i’m going and you’re gonna be fine here. you’re the man of the house now and i don’t know anybody else that i would want to entrust that responsibility to because you are so brave and strong.”

the boy squeezed his father’s hand. “but, why now, dad? why do you have to go now?”

“because it’s my time and i have no choice. you see son, just because we don’t know why things are the way they are, that doesn’t mean that god doesn’t. we just can’t see it now, but you will someday. you’re so smart and beautiful and remember, along with god, i am with you inside always. you can talk to us whenever you want.”

“but how do i do that when you’re not here?” the boy puzzled

“well, at first you close your eyes and focus your attention right here.” the father gently touched the boy’s forehead between the eyes. “clear your mind and start talking and then listen to your heart for an answers. that’s where we are.”

“but it will be just dark,” the boy said

“at first, but in time it will get easier. come now, i have something for you.”

he reached over the bed and grabbed a shoe box from a shelf that ran along the window sill. he opened the top and inside, neatly stacked upright was a row of envelopes filled with letters

“each one of these envelopes has a number on it. on the day you reach the age of the number on the letter, i want you to open it and read it. the first one is to be opened and read on your 12th birthday, then on your 15th, then 17th birthday. the next on your 19th, and so on, until you are 45 years old. there are things that you will understand then and if you miss me, you can read the letters.” he handed the box to the boy and stared deeply into his eyes as a peaceful smile came over his face. “now, you remember, son, i love you more than my own life.”

the boy smiled and wept, “i love you too dad.”

the father squeezed the little boy’s tiny hand and signaled the boy with a nod of his head

the boy turned and went to the door, opened it with one hand while clutching the box with the other

the father smiled peacefully as the boy turned and their eyes met one last time. the father could see the outline of the boys little body stepping from the room, and as the door closed, the father could feel his own last breath race from his lungs

- steve vai lyrics

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