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opening doors - stephen sondheim lyrics

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frank
how’s it going?

charley
good. you?

frank
fair

charley
yeah, tell me

frank
chinese laundry

mary
hi

frank
mary?

charley
say h-llo

mary
i think i got a job

frank
where?

mary
true romances

frank
posing?

mary
thank you. writing captions

frank
what about the book?

mary
what about the book?

frank
nothing, are you working on your book?

mary
yes?

frank
good

mary
no?

frank
mary?

mary
right, i know, yes, me and balzac?

charley
i finished the one-act

frank
i got an audition

mary
i started the story

frank
rehearsal pianist

charley
so where are we eating?

mary
i’m moving to playboy

frank
the publisher called me

charley
i’m doing a rewrite

mary
my parents are coming

frank
i saw my fair lady

charley
i rewrote the rewrite

frank
i sort of enjoyed it

mary
i threw out the story

charley
i’m meeting an agent

all
we’ll all get together on sunday

we’re opening doors
singing, “here we are!”
we’re filling up days
on out dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s
looking not too far
we’re following every star ?
there’s not enough time!

frank
i called a producer

charley
i sent off the one-act

mary
i started the story

frank
he said to come see him

charley
i dropped out of college

mary
i met this musician

frank
i’m playing a nightclub

charley
they’re doing my one-act!

mary
i’m working for redbook

frank
i rewrote the ballad

mary
i finished the story

charley
we started rehearsals

mary
i threw out the story
and then the musician
i’m moving to popular science

all
we’re opening doors
singing, “look who’s here!”
beginning to sail
on out dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s
getting very near!
we haven’t a thing to fear
we haven’t got time!

frank
how’s it coming?

charley
good. you?

frank
done

charley
one minute ?

frank
hamburg heaven

mary
hi

frank
mary?

charley
say h-llo

mary
i got another job

frank
where?

mary
chic

frank
what’s that?

mary
a brand-new concept:
pop-up pictures

frank
what about the book?

mary
what about the book?

frank
did you give the publisher the book?

mary
yes?

frank
good

mary
no?

frank
mary?

mary
look, i never?

charley
finished!

frank
let me call you back

mary
right

charley
this is just a draft

frank
right

charley
probably it stinks

frank
right

charley
haven’t had the time to do a polish

frank
will you sing?1

charley
right
“who wants to live in new york?
who wants the worry, the noise, the dirt, the heat?
who wants the garbage cans clanging in the street?
suddenly i do
they’re always popping their cork ”
i’ll fix that line
“the cops, the cabbies, the salesgirls up at saks
you gotta have a real taste for maniacs ?
suddenly i do!”

joe
that’s great. that’s swell
the other stuff as well
it isn’t every day
i hear a score this strong
but fellas, if i may
there’s only one thing wrong:

there’s not a tune you can hum
there’s not a tune you go bum-bum-bum-di-dum
you need a tune you can bum-bum-bum-di-dum ?
give me a melody!

why can’t you throw ’em a crumb?
what’s wrong with letting ’em tap their toes a bit?
i’ll let you know when stravinsky has a hit ?
give me some melody!

oh sure, i know
it’s not that kind of show
but can’t you have a score
that’s sort of in between?
look, play a little more
i’ll show you what i mean ?

charley
“who wants to live in new york?
i’ve always hated the dirt, the heat, the noise
but ever since i met you, i -”

joe
listen, boys
maybe it’s me
but that’s just not a hummmmmmmmmmmmmable melody!
write more, work hard
leave your name with the girl
less avant-garde
leave your name with the girl
just write a plain old melodee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee
dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee

charley
they’re stopping rehearsals
they ran out of money

mary
we lasted one issue
my book was rejected

frank
the nightclub was raided
i have to start coaching

mary
my parents are coming

charley
they screwed up the laundry

frank
my wallet was stolen

mary
i saw the musician

charley
we’re being evicted

mary
i’m having a breakdown

all
we’ll all get together on sunday

they’re slamming doors
singing, “go away!”
it’s less of a sail
than a climb
that faraway sh0r-‘s
farther every day
we’re learning to ricochet ?
we still have a lot to say ?

frank
you know what we’ll do?

charley
what?

frank
we’ll do a revue

charley
what?

mary
what?

frank
we’ll do a revue of our own!

mary
what?

charley
where?

mary
why?

charley
when?

frank
not just songs, but stories, scenes
piano pieces, mime ?

charley
yeah!

mary
frankly frank ?

frank
a showcase of our own?

charley
where?

frank
the club’s reopening

mary
we’ll write a lot of new stuff ?

charley
rewrite the old stuff ?

frank
what about the girl?

charley
what about the girl?

frank
only that we’re gonna need a girl

charley
well, mary ?

mary
thanks, i don’t perform except at dinner

girl auditioning
“who wants to live in new york?
who wants the worry, the noise, the dirt, the heat?
who wants the garbage cans -”
i can sing higher-

frank
thank you for coming
next eight, please

beth
“they’re always popping their cork”

frank
up a tone

beth
“the cops, the cabbies, the salesgirls up at saks”

frank
up a tone

beth
“you gotta have a real taste for maniacs”

frank
thank you. you’re hired

beth
i’m beth

frank
i’m frank

beth
i really thought i stank

mary
i’m mary

charley
charley

frank
by the way
i’m told we open sat-rday

mary, beth and charley
what!

mary
you’re not serious!

charley
n0body’s ready!

frank
apparently someone cancelled a booking

charley
the songs aren’t finished

mary
and what about costumes?

beth
and how do i learn all these numbers?

frank
i’ll bring you the copies of everything later this evening

beth
okay, but i’ll have to have all the music, and
sat-rday i’ve got to sing at a wedding. oh
god, is there dancing, ’cause i’m not a dancer ?

charley
not to mention i still haven’t finished the
synanon song or the kennedy number ?

frank
you don’t have to, we’ll segue the
end of it into the dance we cut out ?

charley
and what’ll we do about getting publicity
run around town putting stickers on windows?

mary
and have we decided or not on the restaurant sketch?
i need two or three days to replace it

frank
no, we’ll use it but not with the long introduction

all
we’ll worry about it on sunday!

we’re opening doors, singing, “here we are!”
we’re filling up days on our dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s looking not too far
we’re following every star ?
there’s not enough time!

we’re banging on doors, shouting, “here again!”
we’re risking it all on our dime
that faraway sh0r-‘s looking near again
the only thing left is when
we know we should count to ten ?
we haven’t got time!
we haven’t got time!

- stephen sondheim lyrics

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