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sweaty dollar bills - stephen lynch lyrics

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it’s time to hang up my g-strings
it’s time to throw those chaps away
the skin is saggy the tan is fading
the stuff is old and grey

exotic dancing was my calling
bionic hips and thunder d-ck
but father time he bought a private dance
and it was over quick

good bye bachelorette shows
good bye soccer moms dirty thrills
good bye monthly g-y nights
and good bye cranking pills
bought with sweaty dollar bills

the younger dancers started teasing
they called me grams and leather sack
i hit the stage with rageous fury and threw out my back

good bye suggested thrusting
good bye thong song giving me chills
good bye cl-ssy bow tie
and matching this with thrills
bought with sweaty dollar bills

now i must lose my pretensions
bronce and blond hair extension
i’ll miss the people the places
grinding in drunk ladies’ faces

so i toss my leather armband and feather earring to the floor
a single tear streaks my cheak as i walk out the door

h-llo reinvention
h-llo learning new sk!lls
h-llo younger dancers
i sell you cranking pills for your sweaty dollar bills

- stephen lynch lyrics

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