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conferences - $stdout lyrics

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[sample of steve ballmer, microsoft ceo]
developers developers developers developers developers
developers developers developers developers developers

[hook]
developers, developers, everywhere i turn
developers with education budgets they can burn
developers nerding out hard trying to learn
developers networking and its awkward

developers, yeah you know we love free stuff
developers, yeah you know we love food trucks
developers, yeah you know we love free lunch
at the conference got the lecture hall turned up

[verse 1]
i’m at the conference check out the sponsors, check out the swag
stickers by the stack, free water bottles in my bag (yeah)
stop by the booth grabbing t-shirts by the roll
if i do this twice a year, i won’t have to shop for clothes (i won’t have to shop for clothes)

yeah i came to network
but sparking up a convo takes effort (hi…)
i should go and talk to someone i don’t know
but i’m shy gotta to find my friends first

hit the workshop, speaker dropping knowledge like a wiz (d-mn!)
my biggest accomplishment is centering a div

i’ll keep nodding as if i’m just following along
but honestly i really have no clue what’s really going on

jotting down some notes that i’ll never read
feels like everybody is ahead of me (i’m a noob)
go and find a corner try to get some work done
i brought all my business cards but i’ve handed out none (none)

[repeat hook]

[verse 2]
grabbing dinner everything is lukewarm
they call it tacos but it’s looking like some cardboard (yeah)
ain’t this what they have all those sponsors for?
this is what i dropped a thousand dollars for?!

find a table i’m not a talker it’s super-awkward
just trying to eat my food dude keeps bringing up docker
i’m leaving i need the bathroom it is about the time
of course there’s a long–ss line

so i head outside checking out the mediocre band
crowd stands hands in pockets like a high school dance
except one guy who clearly got too drunk
beer in his neckbeard yelling “rails 5 sucks!”

i don’t even know why i keep coming here
i had all the same complaints last year
so i go to my hotel and try to get some work done
i brought all my business cards but i’ve handed out none

[repeat hook]

- stdout lyrics

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