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safety school (harvard diss track) - stanford fleet street singers lyrics

what happened to you?
look at yourself, are you proud?
respect your elders?
you’re no longer worth my respect

so you’ve got a couple reasons
to think that you’re the best
you’re prestigious, you’re historic
and you’re richer than the rest
but while you’ve got a big endowment
and you’re feeling all proud
listen-you may have an endowment
but you’re not so well endowed
you’ve got a lot of cl-sses but you don’t got any cl-ss
got inflation so bad you gotta try not to p-ss
your ego is so big too bad your iq doesn’t match
you put the m-ss in m-ssachusetts
and the -ss in veritas
you’re sitting out there freezing
but you’re some how still not cool
too bad you weren’t prepared for that in preparatory school
live without your parents’ help
you wouldn’t have the guts
would take you 4+ years to do a puzzle age 4+

someone had to say it
someone had to do it
someone had to write this down
cause everybody knew it
it’s what everybody’s thinking
it’s what everybody knows
but somebody needed to stand up and say that
the emperor has no clothes

we are the cardinal-you’re on the margin
you’ll never be our equals
just like the trilogies, we the originals
you’re the sub par prequels
we’re so magnetic, you want to stay current?
you’ll need the right hand rule
you may have campus safety but you’re
still a safety school

we got more olympic medals
than a first world nation
so what if you got presidents?
the precedent is changing
the future is in tech
and you’re past your expiration
but what more would you expect from liberal arts education
we’re the #1 computer science school on the planet
we made the internet
around the world, we ran it
but at harvard if you wanna get a cs degree?
it’s too late, wannabe
shoulda gone to m.i.t
we invented google and a billion other things
what did you contribute?
zuckerburg and bing?
while we lead the way in artificial intelligence
you just use big words-artificially intelligent

ayyo
real talk though harvard
why you hatin’ on us asians
our leadership, helpfulness, courage, and kindness
are lower than caucasians’?
think we all want to be doctors?
think we all do kung fu?
smells like certain jewish quotas set in 1922
now let’s look at the facts
and the cl-sses you impact
you let rich kids in the cl-ss
cause their dads give you fat stacks
the legacies and rowers
all barrel through your gates
but for the underprivileged
it’s the narrow, not the straight

we are the cardinal-you’re on the margin
make sure this ain’t misunderstood
a snap of our fingers would make you say
mr. stark, i don’t feel so good
the party is over, your cl-sses are cancelled
it’s time you rest in peace
when this song is over
you’ll be the stanford of the east

sorry we just ended your whole career

- stanford fleet street singers lyrics

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