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did you know you were hurting me? - st. meave lyrics

i’m too scared to go to sleep and dream
of what we could of been
your strongest weapon was your smile
as you knew it would be imbedded in my head
more then the words that you have said
i noticed you play your music at full volume
to escape the demons that scream in your head
the demons that hide under your bed
there is a glitch in your system
i can see the facade
how you hide behind them
because you’re too scared of being yourself
bеcause you can’t deal with being kickеd to the curb
i look back on all the times i have you a 5th*second chance
you used my kindness to your advantage
i noticed you fell for another somebody
by the way you changed your focus from me to my body
i obviously didn’t mean a lot to you
i could tell by the way you let me go
without a fight
almost as if you wanted me gone
i wonder if i ever did something wrong
i placed my trust in your hands
and you clenched them and crushed it to dust
everything that was us
i play with my skin in fear you’ll never come back
why were you late?
who did you taste
who did you place my trust into?
who was given my trust i gave to you
the trust you were supposed to hold onto
i still wish the best for you
even tho you hurt me
badly
you’ll never find someone that can match up to me
i know you don’t believe me but time will slowly open your wounds until you realise i was the best
it won’t let you rest
i know your running out of luck
i’m tired of fighting for validation
i noticed you look down at your feet a lot
i decided to be delicate with you
protect you
so you know you are loved
i didn’t expect anything in return
are you shy
is that why you don’t approach me
is that why you don’t appreciate me
the day we met in december i will always remember
but the damage you created at the start of february
hurt me
it burned me
but i still love the version of you i keep in my head
to fill the empty sp*ce i feel in my bed
i blame myself for the damage you made
because if i stayed
a little longer
i wonder if that would open your eyes
make you realise
that someone who didn’t care for you
wouldn’t burn themselves so you wouldn’t have to
did you know the pain you caused me?
or was the pain imaginary?
because i part of me wonders
if everything you did was a lie
if it was in my head all this time
because i’ve never been treated right
so why would the person of my dreams
hold me so tight?
but it doesn’t feel right
because you say you love me
then you leave me
you go for weeks
and randomly come back
when you need something from me
did you know you were hurting me?
did i know you were using me?
were we imaginary
were you sow thing i made up to escape from the harsh reality
did you know you were hurting me, severely?

- st meave lyrics

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