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stats god - spicy squad lyrics

look, i was gonna skew this curve to save your grade
but i’m only going to get this one chance
something’s skewed, i can feel it
just a feeling i’ve got
(30 samples, 30 samples, 30 samples ,rayside, you’re on!)
like there’s about to be bias, but i don’t know how
if that means what i think it means
we’re in trouble, big trouble; and if this data is as skewed as you say, then im not taking any chances
you’re just what the c.i calculated!

i’m beginning to feel like a stats god, stats god
all my distributions appear normal, normal
now, who thinks their p value is low enough to re-ject, ho
they said i stat hard, so call me nate silv

but for me to stat like a calculator, it must be in my jeans
i got a ti in my back pocket
my h-gram will pop when i zoom-9 it
got a fat 5 from that stat profit
made a livin’ and a k!llin’ off it
ever since dean rayside was in his office
with all of his cl-sses admiring his, stem plot
i’m a statistician still as impartial
with a dot plot straight and normal, as a bell
statistics, stat-a-holic (k!ll ’em all with)
this flippity dippity-hippity stat-prob
you don’t really wanna get into a gamblin’ match
with this rappity-rap, packin’ a gnome in the back of the dome’
bookbag rap cr-p, yap-yap, yackety-yack
and at the exact same time i attempt these statistical acrobat stunts while i’m practicin’ that
i’ll still be able to make a frequency table
over the back of a couple ap-graders and crack it in half
only realized foods was full
i was signed to ap stats after the fact
how could i not block? all i do is drop z-tests
feel the wrath of my stat-attack
seniors are havin’ a rough time period, here’s a curve, glad?
it’s actually disastrously sad for the back
while i’m masterfully eliminating this response bias, wack?

i’m beginning to feel like a stats god, stats god
all my distributions appear normal, normal
now, who thinks their p value is low enough to re-ject, ho
let me show you maintaining this chi
ain’t stan-dard, stan-dard
everybody want the answer key and the secret
to stats immortality like i have got

well, to be truthful the blueprint’s
simply alternative hypothesis
every p loves to reject the ho list
skew a cl-ss like extrapolation
did nothing but shoot for the 5 since (pew!)
statisticians get taken to school with this music
‘cause i use it as a reminder to “check conditions”
now i lead a new school full of students

me? i’m a product of rayside
trevor, alex, amanda, kashi- the sails and anchors implied
parent, delo, thank you, they got quinn

inspired enough to one day grow up
blow up and be in a position
to find a normal population. and induct them
into the sampling method hall of fame

even though i’ll walk in the school
and burst through a gl-ss frame
only hall of fame i’ll be inducted in is the stats of the gamep
on delo’s wall of (shame)
you frosh think it’s all a game, ’til i walk the talk of claim
off a plank and, tell me what in the heck are you testing

little skewed-looking plot
so skewed i can barely say it looks normal, looking plot
you’re witnessing a statsacre, like you’re watching a church gathering take place, looking plot
“oy vey, that plot’s skewed!”, that’s all they say, looking plot
you get a fat 5, pat on the back
and a “way to go” from rayside every day, looking plot
hey, looking plot! what you say, looking plot?
i get a “hell yeah” from ray, looking plot
i’ma work for everything i have, never ask nobody for it
get outta my face, looking plot!
basically, plot, you’re never gonna be capable
of appearing like normal, looking plot

i’m beginning to feel like a stats god, stats god
all my distributions appear normal, normal
the way i’m racing through this test
call me nascar, nascar
ms. ferrante of the math wing, the best stats god
kneel before the spicy squad
this planet’s mi-ld – no, hot sauce, hot sauce

so you be beef and i’ll be jiho, rodent, i’m the exponent
let off, my calc is loadin’
immediately with this mean i’m totin’
and i’m not even jokin; i’m the h.o misread
just as tasty as your mom’s banana bread, a monkey croakin

but i got this chi squared chokin’
i’m out my response bias
don’t even try to buy us
i’m a double blind, pinch yourself
in the arm and pay homage, pupil
it’s me, my stats sk!lls are brutal
but it’s honestly futile if i don’t utilize what i do though

for good at least once in awhile
so i wanna make sure, somewhere in this chicken scratch i scribble and sample enough times
to maybe try to help get some data a hundred times
but i have an interval to define
just in case, ‘cause even you unsigned
statters are hungry looking at me like it’s spring time
i know there was a time where once i
was king of the stat playgroud
but i still rap like i’m on my spicy squad grind
so i commit stat crimes, but sometimes when you combine
appeal with the stat sk!lls of mine
you get too big and here they come tryin’
to test you, like that prob line
he said on “raw track” from jason ahn 5 when i
tried to say it’ll be easy peezy lemon… squeezy-ine
put the data in a line, add a log func, make it smaller and get a 5

see if i get an e with it
now that i ain’t as big as i was, but i’m
morphin’ into an stat-mortal, comin’ through the portal
you’re stuck in a time warp from back in 98’, though
and i don’t know how the heck you’re a stat distortion
you’re pointless as a t-test with just proportions
it is normal? skew being normal!
and i just bought a borders gift card from the future
just to come and rule ya

like when dkoh made rayside mad
‘cause brit said he performed bad like type 2 error- dad!
singin’ to a man while they lowered the power
man, oh man, that was a 24/7 special on the calcluator panel
so rayside went straight to the genesis gradebook
the very next day, “hey d, i’ma fail you!”
zeroes comin’ at you at supersonic speed (jay ahn bad)
uh, summa-lumma, dooma-lumma
you -ssumin’ i’m a student
what i gotta do to get it through to you? i’mma statistician
innovative and made of regressions
so that anything you calculating is coming from me
and it’ll prove to you that i’m that amazing
more than ever demonstrating how to give a stressed out student a feelin’
like he’s in the matrix
learning lessons, and i know these students are motivated
for the day that they can say “domain err”, they’ll be celebrating
‘cause i know the way to get ’em calculating
i make linear regressions, you make lumineers’ collections
“oh, he’s too spicy”
well, that’s what they do when they get jealous they confuse it “it’s not hot sauce, it’s ranch.”
‘cause i found a hella way to fuse it
with peps, chiles with george
throw on “raw track 2” and make waleed lose it
“i don’t know how to reject ho like that
i don’t know what test to use.”
let me know when it occurs to you
while i’m writing any one of these h.o.’s i’m rejecting
it’s sad but i’m inadvertently rejectin’ you
how many histograms gotta make to
prove that if n was half of sixty
your t-tests won’t proceed with caution

ungh, stats flunky, math monkey
but look at the accolades these stats brung me
a average but still hungry
i bully myself, ‘cause i make me do what i put my mind to
and i’m 2 z scores above you
greek letters cuz we know popu
but it’s still s sub x to you!

i’m confounded– so sails, take the stats wheel!
i’m asleep in the poop deck
punchin’ that random dude like artest, still no true world peace
but in my notes there’s something
i can feel tugging and struggling
jihos work with byung suks, and here’s what they want from us
they’re asking us to eliminate some of the cl-ssmates
but if you take into consideration the type of data i have
then you may be a little patient
and more sympathetic to the situation
and understand the spicy nation
but skew it, life’s handin’ you p-valvs, then make it two tailed then!
but if you can’t respect the women
how could they be in the house and the sen-ate?

don’t mistake it for true; it’s a fatal mistake
if you think i need to have over a c
to take a seat on the throne with spicy squad
and make us fall from grace and
don’t be a ranch dress; be a stats king? think squad
why be a stats king when you can be a stats god?

- spicy squad lyrics

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