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twitch streams and haircuts - sophie dingsdale lyrics

i have to hide the kitchen scissors so i don’t cut my hair
when 3am convinces me to
i’d rather watch someone else play video games
cause every time i try i lose
i’ve got a list as long as my arm of songs i never finished
cause i talked myself out of them
and i can’t keep a friend, i’m always so f*cking lonely
but ignore every text i get

i don’t need your pity
barely a dot on the map but i’ll pretend it’s new york city
fascinated by girls twice as pretty
buying clothes way too small and hoping one day they’ll fit me
and it’s really a pity
i just wonder what i’d look like if i was skinny
i can see it in your eyes you’re feeling guilty
but i don’t need your pity

i dye my hair a thousand shades, put myself up on the stage
but worry if i’m being too loud
i read of the chosen ones wishing i knew such adventure
but get scared just leaving my house
i wanna move to the city, walk the busiest streets
i’d love to be another face in the crowd
tell myself i don’t need friends, i should block every number
so they can’t be the ones to shut me out
but i don’t need your pity
barely a dot on the map but i’ll pretend it’s new york city
fascinated by girls twice as pretty
buying clothes way too small and hoping one day they’ll fit me
and it’s really a pity
i just wonder what i’d look like if i was skinny
i can see it in your eyes you’re feeling guilty
but i don’t need your pity

never thought i was ugly til you told me i was
taught a nine year old girl she belonged with the dogs
too short but too tall, always scolded for her scars
but i’m not that little girl anymore

if i could talk to her once, i’d hold her face so gentle
i’d say, “you’re more than your dress size, you’ll always be f*cking special
you’re more than the opinion of one who’s hollowed out inside
someday self*love won’t be the biggest compromise”

but i don’t need your pity
barely a dot on the map but i’ll pretend it’s new york city
fascinated by girls i find pretty
but finally i’m starting to see it in me
and it’s really a pity
that it took so long to realise there’s more to life than skinny
for how i let myself feel, i’ll always feel guilty
but i don’t need your pity

- sophie dingsdale lyrics

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