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the justice league is sad - smosh lyrics

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*intro*
[joe]
hey, are you excited for that new ‘justice league’ movie?
[olivia]
not really, i mean all those movies are just so dark and emo
it almost seems like ’dc’ should just stand for ‘depressed characters’
[joe]
yes! i mean they’re superheroes, what do they have to be so depressed about anyways?
[batman]
hey! just because we’re superheroes doesn’t mean we don’t have justified depression! hit it, robot guy!
[cyborg]
my name’s cyborg
[batman]
yeah, whatever

*verse 1*
[cyborg]
we just some emo superheroes
all caught in slow motion
hiding in the shadows
can’t handle our emotions
loved ones always dying
really sucks to be we
now you see why we’re crying
cause we’re always dc!
‘depressed clinically’
medication isn’t cheap (x2)
[batman]
my parents are dead
i got ptsd
i lost my girlfriend
blew up in front of me
always save gotham
it’s kind of a hassle
when i wear my mask
*batman voice*
i talk like an assh0l*
i became my greatest fear
let me be clear about that
to cope with my depression
i became a d*mn bat

[superman]
i also lost my parents
and my whole d*mn planet
saved the human race
but taken for granted
in a dying industry
i make 30k a year
last left of my kind
can’t connect with anyone here
yeah i got a girl
but i don’t have friends
you feel me
when i finally met another hero
tried to k!ll me
saved your planet twice
and then actually died
and i still got haters so yeah
f*ck my life
[batman]
then how are you alive?
you said you just died

*talking*
[batman]
really guys!
are we seriously just gonna overlook the fact that superman was k!lled in ‘batman v superman’? really?! okay, fine, yeah
[olivia]
okay i get why you two are sad but, aquaman? you’re the king of the sea, you’re life must be amazing
[aquaman]
yes but i, can’t find love on dry land
[joe]
i don’t understand aquaman, where do you find love?

*verse 2*
[aquaman}
i’m deep c diving
diddling crustaceans
dolphin cuddling
fish loving nation!
i’m wetting this d can’t you c?
at depths you cannot reach
doing creatures from the sea
bout’ to make that whale beach
i’m done with metaphors
give it straight as h*ll
i’ve f*cked a lot of fish
and you should try as well
put it deep in the blowhole
put it so deep in the blowhole (x2)

*talking*
[aquaman]
*continuing* put it deep in the blowhole
put it so deep in the blowhole
[batman]
okay batty
[aquaman]
brap brap brap
[olivia]
okay, flash, why are you so sad?
[flash]
…i’m impotent
[olivia]
oh
[joe]
okay, um well, i guess we know why you guys are all sad
[olivia]
sorry we judged you
[wonder woman]
no enough, ‘dc’ does not stand for ‘depressed characters’
it stands for… d*ck crusher

*verse 3*
i demonstrate my confidence
you consider consequences
i destroy the criminals
you boys are just miserable
profile, going up
audience, showing up
ticket sales, blowing up!
i dominate the culture
and not to make it vulgure
i’m a d*ck crusher
don’t be fooled cuz i’m a stunner
and just in case you wonder
i’m a d*ck crusher
i see a d*ck
i crush it
i an’t gonna rush it

d*ck crusher (x3)

*talking*
[olivia*
oh my god!
[joe]
that’s correct! dc is awesome!
[olivia]
we should go see ‘justice league’ right now!
[cyborg]
wait! you forgot my verse, ‘dc’ doesn’t stand for ‘depressed characters’ or ‘d*ck crusher’
[joe]
what does it stand for then?
[cyborg]
dude cyborg 😉

*last verse*
i’m a dude cyborg
i’m a cyborg that’s a dude
i’m a dude cyborg
i’m a cyborg that’s a
dude cyborg
i’m a cyborg that’s a dude
i’m a dude cyborg
i’m a cyborg that’s a
du*du*du
du*du
du*du*du
du*du
i’m a dude cyborg
i’m a cyborg that’s a dude

*talking*
[joe]
okay, let’s just go watch ‘avengers’ for the 15th time
[olivia]
yeah, this sucks

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