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a deception (municipal mix) - simon bookish lyrics

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i have somehow conned the administration of the trainwreck into believing that i am qualified to operate a train. my ruse was to visit the head office each day and just walk in and sit down in a room which i decided was ‘my office’, although it more closely resembles a dirty cupboard. i am able to convince them because i am extra, extra friendly to the man who sits at the security gate. i wave and shout in a c-ckney accent, “alwight charlie!” and he smiles, opens the gate and lets me in

on the train itself i am enjoying ‘my job’ very much. my lack of training, however, means i do not have the special key to open the doors automatically, so people are having difficulty getting in and out. fortunately, since the train drives itself, i don’t have much else to worry about and i chat away to the p-ssengers, who are fooled by my blue uniform and hat. two women have no tickets and i explain that they will be subject to an on-the-spot fine. i then realise that i do not possess a little book to issue a fine from, so pretend i’m being benevolent and let them off

back in my office. but i am worried. the managers are on my case and are waiting for me to slip up. someone’s been rifling through my files. my suspicions are confirmed when i fling open the door and find my yacht has been taken away (a yacht being a perk of the job). i wander away from the office and everything becomes calm. outside is a long, verdant lagoon, with weeping willows by the water and thick green moss underfoot. in the distance is a house on an island. people are slowly swimming around it

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