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superman and me essay - sherman alexie lyrics

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editor’s note: the following essays by sherman alexie, j.d. mcclatchy, robert pinsky, mona simpson and ted kooser are included in a recent anthology published by milkweed editions, entitled “the most wonderful books: writers on discovering the pleasures of reading.” they are reprinted here with the kind permission of the publisher and the authors

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i learned to read with a superman comic book. simple enough, i suppose. i cannot recall which particular superman comic book i read, nor can i remember which villain he fought in that issue. i cannot remember the plot, nor the means by which i obtained the comic book. what i can remember is this: i was 3 years old, a spokane indian boy living with his family on the spokane indian reservation in eastern washington state. we were poor by most standards, but one of my parents usually managed to find some minimum-wage job or another, which made us middle-cl-ss by reservation standards. i had a brother and three sisters. we lived on a combination of irregular paychecks, hope, fear and government surplus food

my father, who is one of the few indians who went to catholic school on purpose, was an avid reader of westerns, spy thrillers, murder mysteries, gangster epics, basketball player biographies and anything else he could find. he bought his books by the pound at dutch’s p-wn shop, goodwill, salvation army and value village. when he had extra money, he bought new novels at supermarkets, convenience stores and hospital gift shops. our house was filled with books. they were stacked in crazy piles in the bathroom, bedrooms and living room. in a fit of unemployment-inspired creative energy, my father built a set of bookshelves and soon filled them with a random -ssortment of books about the kennedy -ss-ssination, watergate, the vietnam war and the entire 23-book series of the apache westerns. my father loved books, and since i loved my father with an aching devotion, i decided to love books as well

i can remember picking up my father’s books before i could read. the words themselves were mostly foreign, but i still remember the exact moment when i first understood, with a sudden clarity, the purpose of a paragraph. i didn’t have the vocabulary to say “paragraph,” but i realized that a paragraph was a fence that held words. the words inside a paragraph worked together for a common purpose. they had some specific reason for being inside the same fence. this knowledge delighted me. i began to think of everything in terms of paragraphs. our reservation was a small paragraph within the united states. my family’s house was a paragraph, distinct from the other paragraphs of the lebrets to the north, the fords to our south and the tribal school to the west. inside our house, each family member existed as a separate paragraph but still had genetics and common experiences to link us. now, using this logic, i can see my changed family as an essay of seven paragraphs: mother, father, older brother, the deceased sister, my younger twin sisters and our adopted little brother

at the same time i was seeing the world in paragraphs, i also picked up that superman comic book. each panel, complete with picture, dialogue and narrative was a three-dimensional paragraph. in one panel, superman breaks through a door. his suit is red, blue and yellow. the brown door shatters into many pieces. i look at the narrative above the picture. i cannot read the words, but i -ssume it tells me that “superman is breaking down the door.” aloud, i pretend to read the words and say, “superman is breaking down the door.” words, dialogue, also float out of superman’s mouth. because he is breaking down the door, i -ssume he says, “i am breaking down the door.” once again, i pretend to read the words and say aloud, “i am breaking down the door” in this way, i learned to read

this might be an interesting story all by itself. a little indian boy teaches himself to read at an early age and advances quickly. he reads “grapes of wrath” in kindergarten when other children are struggling through “d-ck and jane.” if he’d been anything but an indian boy living on the reservation, he might have been called a prodigy. but he is an indian boy living on the reservation and is simply an oddity. he grows into a man who often speaks of his childhood in the third-person, as if it will somehow dull the pain and make him sound more modest about his talents

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