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schoolyard blues - seymour butts lyrics

[verse 1]
i’m the piranha, so listen to my raps you little guppies
when i tell you that my school was full of misunderstanding yuppies
that, maybe at times, weren’t so bad as i may or may not imagine
but middle-cl-ss and poverty weren’t things they could fathom
my school wasn’t top-notch, nah, it was cheap and poor as h-ll
so why the richie riches applied there, i never could quite tell
they could’ve gone to a school with castle-doors and a diamond moat
but f-ck them, let me tell you this speedy anecdote
about the time that i was on the bus with a little f-cking coward
such a d-mn p-ssy that he could’ve been wearing flowers
he was talking sh-t about me in the way-back back of the bus
and after and upstanding rivalry with that kid, i just had to cuss
i wanted to pick him up and send him to texas or way down south
i said, “keep my godd-mn name out of your mouth”
and my bus driver had then rightfully had enough of our cr-p
so he headed back to the school, and swerved off of the map
the kid, whose name was matthew, had a bigger sister, morgan
and she was almost as godawful, like a motherf-cking gorgon
we were met by the superintendent, boom, we were evicted
and there were tears in his eyes, which could’ve been easily predicted
anyway, that just shows to stand up for yourself when you have had it
and that just showcases that bullies are little f-ggots

[chorus]

[verse 2]
yo, i remember one time out on the baseball field
when this kid’s buddies were throwing muddy kickb-lls at him
and they wouldn’t yield, but he was laughing, and then
my friend went with the crowd and threw one too and then
he claimed that it ruined his brand new shirt
and then he vowed that he would make my friend hurt
he threw multiple b-lls at my poor friend’s skull
wouldn’t stop attacking him till his conscience dulled
and then our b-tchy princ-p-l called in some eyewitnesses
i told her the story but she claimed that the bully was innocent
and instead punished my friend, and then the same friend
got mugged by some -ssh0l- at the school dance
but my friends got revenge and made his vocal cords prance
“we’re avenging you, brother, sure we will
let’s dump his lacrosse bag into the urinal
and pee on it, flush it, and stick our wee-wees on it”

- seymour butts lyrics

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