the fall. - seth galbasin lyrics
it’s 2:00 at night…
all the lights are off except the one protruding from my computer screen
an empty canvas on google docs open, staring blankly at the whiteness with zero thoughts
completely and utterly emotionally and mentally drained
unable to sleep, or even close my eyes
i close my laptop to find a motive, find anything that would help me sleep or a subject for song
as i walked into the kitchen i felt my knees buckle. my whole legs started cramping and it became almost impossible to walk
i made it into the piano room before my legs finally gave up on me. my eyes finally began closing and i felt myself slowly tip over, and as my sanity slowly drifted away… i collapsed onto the ground
(happy upbeat piano chords start)
(still in spoken monologue)
i woke up on the floor with no memory of dreams or even being asleep. just like i had hit the ground and woke up, but never actually wasn’t awake, just passed out for ten minutes and woke up a millisecond after i hit the ground
something was very very wrong. and this moment in the universe helped me realise that…
i need to get better
(spoken monolouge and music continues)
(musical interlude)
(now singing)
i’ll start all of my mornings off by waking up at a good time
i’ll have a healthy breakfast, makin’ sure my health doesn’t decline
i’ll brush my t**th, and wash my hands, and not procrastinate
i’ll get to school and write my songs and )not ruin( my mental state
*******************************************************************************************
and no, i am not ruined. i’m positive it’s not too late
i still have plenty of time before all my chances disintegrate
i’ve burnt all of my bridges, and this can not be a waste
i don’t have other options and i don’t have “just in case.”
******************************************************************************
i know i suck at this and i’m not exactly a go getter
i have 800 things to do and i need to be*
(chorus) (chorus is psychedelic and feels like an acid trip.)
better. (better better better)
better. (lower)
(barely audible through warped effects)
nows the only time for me
nows the time for me to be
(said: better.)
(verse)
i start all of my mornings off by waking up an hour late
i sit down on the couch and shovel down some frosted flakes
i don’t have time to brush my t**th or wash my hands
so i completely avoid them, despite my mom’s demands
*******************************************************************************************
and there is some improving. now i own a water bottle
not filled with root beer! just “grape infused particles” (mumbled in shame)
whatever! who cares, i swear to god i’m fine
i can fix all of these f*cking problems in my own time
******************************************************************************
so i’m confronting my fears of death, and writing fantasy a letter
that’s a sign, that i am fine, and i can be*
(chorus) (chorus is psychedelic and feels like an acid trip.)
better. (better better better)
better. (lower)
(barely audible through warped effects)
now’s the only time for me
now’s the time for me to be
(said: better.)
(bridge)
i know my attempts at trying arent working at all
and i know i still have to drink, and make sure i don’t fall
make sure that my plans of being better don’t go to sh*t
all i gotta do is work on being healthy, and drinking water, and being friendly, and not being a d*ck, and working on my derealisation, and my suici(dul) friends, and my songs and my writing, and my piano sk!lls, and all the hobbies i gave up on, and getting out there, and singing in front of people, and dealing with bullying, and not hating myself, and making friends, and keeping in touch with my friends i have now, and getting a girlfriend or boyfriend, and finding out if i want a boyfriend, and becoming seth, and posting on my socials, and doing all the academic sh*t, and i am doing f*cking none of it!!!!
(pause)
(spoken)
it’s a slow process, but i am improving. and i can and will do this. i will be healthy. i will end up being a musical comedian, i will be famous and loved, i will find friends, and a relationship. and i will find out all of this on my own time. i have plenty of it. but i need to work harder
i will be better
(chorus) (chorus is psychedelic and feels like an acid trip.)
better. (better better better)
better. (lower)
(barely audible through warped effects)
nows the only time for me
nows the time for me to be
better. (better better better)
better. (pitch gets so low it disappears)
(song ends)
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