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maybe she's shomer negiyah - schmekel lyrics

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[ricky]
there’s a party at the synagogue for simchat torah
everybody is dancing the hora
i find myself a spot next to shlomo
all this handholding is a little bro-mo
oy vey! if they find out that i’m trans
they don’t recognize me with tzitzis and pants
even though i have a beard and spectacles
they won’t hold my hand if i don’t have a schmeckticle

and all the ladies are like ‘who’s this darlin’ punim’
i heard he’s a feygeleh who likes the bonim
but n-body minds listening to a man sing
before my transition it would have led to mixed dancing
so while they’re all doing the hava nagila
let’s go to my house and smoke a nargilah
but if you think that this is a shidduch then see ya
because i could never be shomer negiyah

you met a nice maydelah but you’re not gonna shtup her
even all the feygelehs know that some girls just want a chupper
maybe she is monogamous, i have no idea
or maybe she thinks i’m a communist
or maybe she’s shomer negiyah

yai di dai dah dai dai dai dai
yah di dai dah dai dai dai

i can -ssure you my intentions are holy
i’m a true mensch and i take it slowly
i rest on the shabbos and i read the torah
i don’t eat pork but i’m poly-amoruh
’cause even though i’m into girls, unlike lucian
i don’t believe in the marriage inst-tution
but we didn’t shake hands when i said ‘chag sameach’
’cause she’s keepin’ it kosher like shmuley boteach
we didn’t shake hands when i said ‘chag sameach’
’cause she’s keepin’ it kosher like shmuley boteach

[lucian]
no they didn’t shake hands when he said ‘chag sameach’
’cause she’s keeping it kosher like shmuley boteach

[ricky]
you met a nice maydelah but you’re not gonna shtup her
even all the feygelehs know that some girls just want a chupper
maybe she is monogamous, i have no idea
or maybe she thinks i’m a zionist
or maybe she’s shomer negiyah

yai di dai dah dai dai dai dai
yah di dai dah dai dai dai

you met a nice maydelah but you’re not gonna shtup her
even all the feygelehs know that some girls just want a chupper
maybe she is monogamous, i have no idea
or maybe i’m a hippopotamus
or maybe she’s shomer negiyah

yai di dai dah dai dai dai dai
yah di dai dah dai dai dai

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