the contest - sacha baron cohen lyrics
[pirelli, sung]
i am adolfo pirelli
da king of da barbers
da barber of kings
e buon giorno, good day
i blow you a kiss
and i, da so famous pirelli
i wish-a to know-a who has-a the nerve-a to say
my elixir is p-ss!
who says this?
[todd, spoken]
i do. i’m mr. sweeney todd from fleet street. i have opened a bottle of pirelli’s elixir and i say to you, it is nothing but
an arrant fraud, concocted from p-ss and ink. furthermore, signor, i have serviced no kings, yet i wager that i can shave a
cheek with ten times more dexterity than any street mountebank
[pirelli, spoken]
you hear dis foolish man? now please you will see how he will-a regret-a his-a folly!
[todd, spoken]
who’s for a free shave? will beadle bamford be the judge?
[bamford, spoken]
glad, as always to oblige my friends and neighbors. the fastest, smoothest shave, is the winner!
[pirelli, sung]
now signorini, signori
we mix-a da lather
but first-a you gather
around signorini, signori
you looking a man
who have had-a da glory
to shave-a da pope
mister sweeney, whoever
i beg-a your pardon
you’ll probably say it was only a cardinal
nope!
it was-a da pope!
to shave-a da face
to cut-a da hair
require a grace
require da flare
for if-a you slip
you nick da skin
you clip-a da chin
you rip-a the lip a bit beyond-a repair
to shave-a da face
or even a part
widout it-a smart
require da heart
not just-a da flash
it take-a panache
it take-a da p-ssion for da art
to shave-a da face
to trim-a da beard
to make-a da bristle
clean like a whistle
dis is from early infancy
da talent give to me by god
it take-a da sk!ll
it take-a da brains
it take-a da will
to take-a da pains
it take-a da pace
it take-a da graaaaaaaaaaaaace
[bamford, spoken]
the winner—is todd!
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