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ben shapiro vs destiny: the rap battle - roennreeds lyrics

[intro: ben shapiro and >ben shapiro’s mom]

>how was your debate with destiny today, sweetie?
it was great, mommy
i crushed him with facts and logic
>that’s so great, honey!
i only wish i had a chance to do it all over again
>well, maybe you will in your dreams tonight
>goodnight, my little ben shapiro
goodnight, mommy
in my dreams. ahhhhh

[intro * cont’d: ben shapiro, >destiny, >>jordan peterson]

>>and then i said, lobster?
>>i hardly know her!
*jordan and ben laugh*
*ben shows visible rage*

>and i was like chat, i swear to god
>don’t make me bring back league streams
>oh, sh*t

h*llo, steven. are you ready for our debate round two
rap battle edition?
>you know i always stay strapped, ben
excellеnt. i’ll start
[verse 1: ben shapiro]
yo!
let’s say, hypothetically, purely thеoretically
that we lived in a world where you could spit bars better than me
and make more cheddar than me
nd f*ck wap wetter than me
oh wait, you have a girl’s name, ha! get f*cked, destiny
then maybe you would have a sliver of hope, but nope, you don’t
i predict all of your liberal tropes
your take on abortion is unfortunate
i’m tracking down your coordinates
like israel, i’ll make sure my response is proportionate
got god on my side when i’m sitting in synagogue
goggins, david ain’t got sh*t on me, i’m a demigod
insane rhymes, precision like a verbal surgeon
true to my religion, ’til i was married, i was a virgin
to be expected the art of debate i have perfected
your logic is sus, sorry steven, you’ve been ejected
infringe the second amendment?
veto, i redirect it
may be the nerd of the right but b*tch, you will respect it

and now, a word from our sponsor:
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*smack*
ow!
holy sh*t, you’re insufferable
*scoff* how did you interrupt my ad read in my dream?
i don’t know ben, i guess you just f*cking suck
let me show you how a real mc spits
[verse 2: destiny]
here comes
little ben shapiro, the conservative fool
compensating for all the years that he was bullied in school
always dunking on college students, picking low hanging fruit
while i crush real leftists and do your own job better than you?
your epistemic and meta*ethical framework is sh*t
“it’s called presuppositionalism!”
go f*ck yourself b*tch
you’re all “mr. facts and logic” while your whole worldview
is based on fairy tale bullsh*t that you can’t even prove?
every conservative i debate leaves the venue in tears
i’ve been wrecking people with double your coherence for years
ask alex jones, when i spanked him, made his ego deflate
i’m beginning to feel like i’m the f*cking god of debate
destroy my foes with deadly precision, no pivoting necessary
i left the debate stage, taking this to a cemetery
verdict’s the death penalty
i’m the judiciary
f*ck a manifesto, i just wrote your obituary

not bad, steven
i didn’t want to have to do this, but you’ve left me no choice
it’s time for me to channel ancient hebrew, straight from the kabala
but ben, you could literally die!it’s worth it, if it means defeating the likes of you
this is the end for you, steven
f*ck him up, bucko!
let’s speed it up
[verse 3: ben shapiro, >>jordan peterson]

tiny jewish hat
foreskin missing
my name is ben shapiro and wrecking leftists is what i do for a living
think you can verbally decimate me, your imagination must be wild
cross me and i’ll leave you in rubble, like a palestinian child (>>d*mn!)
my media career’s prolific (>>skrrrt!)
conservative stereotypic (>>ohh!)
don’t want a welfare state or support government programs that are parasitic (>>nope!)
my logic is so *n*lytic (>>facts!)
my ph is highly hasidic (>>hah!)
criticize israel, i’ll get your ass cancelled for being antisemitic (>>b*tch!)

- roennreeds lyrics

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