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he and she - rodgers & hart lyrics

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[luce]
i was i
you were you
and now we’re only we
we are one
who were two
or we had better be

[dromio of syracuse]
i now you man and wife and magically you are the boss of me

[luce]
though marriage made you mine for life
it also made you think much less of me

[dromio of syracuse]
it only shows how little you know of it

[luce]
i know a pair who made quite a go of it

[dromio of syracuse spoken]
who?

[luce]
he was a man, who was very fond of women
she was a girl, who was very fond of men
she had a taste, for both corpulent and slim men
he wouldn’t look, at a lady under ten
she went abroad, just to find a man to marry

[dromio of syracuse]
he went abroad, just to find himself a wife

[luce]
she didn’t want, any tom or d*ck or harry

[dromio of syracuse]
he sought a mate, who’d be true to him for life

[luce]
she fell in love, with the angle of his eyebrow

[dromio of syracuse]
he fell in love, with the dimple on her knee

[both]
and when they wed
he went around with other women
and she went with other men
and that is he and she!

[luce]
he always said, i would like to have a daughter

[dromio of syracuse]
she always said, i would like to have a son
she took to kids, like a duckling takes to water

[luce]
he always thought, having babies would be fun
he told her this, on the very day he met her

[dromio of syracuse]
she said the wish, is the father to sport

[luce]
he bought a house, in the nursery he set her

[dromio of syracuse]
she helped the stork make its annual report

[luce]
he won renown as the father of a squadron

[dromio of syracuse]
she won awards for her prolificacy

[both]
and just because
and just because they loved their children
they got married after all
and that is he and she!

[luce spoken]
you dance divinely

[dromio of syracuse]
she was so pure, as the snow before it’s driven

[luce]
he never smoked, and he never touched a drop

[dromio of syracuse]
when she said boo, she would ask to be forgiven

[luce]
when he would swim, he would always wear a top

[dromio of syracuse]
she wore no rouge, though she had a bad complexion

[luce]
he always prayed, every time he went to bed

[dromio of syracuse]
she was so kind, that she hated vivisection

[luce]
he loved his ma and he swore he’d never wed

[dromio of syracuse]
she was so chaste that it made her very nervous

[luce]
he loved to go to the vicarage for tea

[both]
and when they died
and when they died and went to heaven
all the angels went to h*ll
and that is he and she!

- rodgers hart lyrics

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