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star's partner - rob paravonian lyrics

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i’m a dead man
i’m the star’s partner
in every cop film i am the martyr
the star needs a reason for revenge
so the bad guys gotta k!ll one of his friends
and of course that’s me
the writer was a hack
since the opening scene
i’ve had a target on my back

i’m the star’s partner
i don’t have a chance in h-ll
i’m the star’s partner
dying is the only thing i do well
i’m the star’s partner
the guy with all the funny lines
i never make it to the end of the film
no matter how i try
i know i’m gonna die

i don’t know why nothing ever goes right
or why the star always gets us in gunfights
i guess he’s just always so jacked up
that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t call for back up
and i don’t know why i can’t avoid harm
i get shot in the chest while the star gets shot in the arm

oh yeah
i’m the star’s partner
i’m going down in a blaze of glory
i’m the star’s partner
my death is integral to the story
i’m the star’s partner
i only get so much screen time
i never make it to the end of the film
no matter how i try
i know i’m gonna die

so don’t get too attached to me
i’ll be dead by act two, scene three
it might get you down but don’t let it
just look for my name in the closing credits
i’ll be there, listed right after the star’s love interest

i’m the star’s partner
the funny guy that got k!lled
i’m the star’s partner
this job sucks but it pays the bills
i’m the star’s partner
a victim of the plot line
i never make it to the end of the film
no matter how i try
i know i’m gonna die, star’s partner
i know i’m gonna die, star’s partner
i know i’m gonna die, star’s partner
(and i was one day short of retirement)

- rob paravonian lyrics

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