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holding on - rivilin lyrics

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[rivilin]

losing conscious from the panic attacks
yeah they build and swell deep inside you when you find you relapse
on pills that never helped you surface
yours breaking down, it’s hurting

me and you and all of your friends
i see your wrists start to bleed when you panic again
with the razor blades cutting at your voice till you can’t speak
see your legs dangling but you won’t fall im holding on

cut up, cut up you falter
your blank stare just stares cut straight through me
again and again
and again and again

i miss your smile from back then
your breathing but you are not there
its k!lls me, it k!lls me
it k!lls me again

i’ve never been deserted like this, yeah
now i know what they meant when they said that ignorance was bliss
with the pills and the pain that it just built
all the drugs that you tried just to numb yourself
cus im still suicidal
so you tell me that losing a best friend would never work out
but i lost you and lost a lot of time
losing myself in the depths of my mind

the game called life didn’t work out on my end
im still struggling to get where i needed to be
but losing you hit the nail in the coffin
i’d be lying man if i said i didn’t think about you often

and im sick of it
i still get high every day like i used too
cus i miss you so much
yeah, where did you go

[$lothboi]

they ask me whats my problem is and then they f*cking cry
cuz they cannot handle stories of my mother f*cking life like
yes i seen some suicide and yes i’ve f*cking tried
but i’m never going back to that f*cking place, right?

gone for some days and i’m back in night
i been on a f*cking binge and i know it ain’t right
i been crying for a week but i been out of sight
so it ain’t n0body’s problem, sh*t its just my fight
i been fighting since the start
the age of sixteen
this depression made me dark
sloth born from a seed

like i don’t wanna start
the ptsd
but i seen bodies on the floor
since i was 18, f*ck

i ain’t playing this my life
yeah

sloth really seen some sights
man
its been f*cking my head d*mn
i might f*cking jump and end it

[rivilin]

2x
cut up, cut up you falter
your blank stare just stares cut straight through me
again and again
and again and again
i miss your smile from back then
your breathing but you are not there
its k!lls me, it k!lls me
it k!lls me again

- rivilin lyrics

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