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how i've been - ridgy lyrics

[verse 1: ridgy]
i’m kept up by the thoughts that i been havin’
i’m swept i feel abandoned
left me in my psyche, more like a cavern
tested like it’s litmus, god knows my time is passin’
nothing i can do, gotta cause some more damage
trigger on the pulse, i was shooting for the stars
vigorously told em i was moving
instinct left me bold, but i was finished
truly scared, battlescars left bruises on my skin
blue from all within
withering away, all i can do is grin
[verse 2: ridgy]
i spent days on the ledge, like it’s oldboy
i wanna rest but there’s no sleep for the wicked
i put blood in the ink, i’m committed
all of my memories collected, yet omitted
it’s like memento cos i’d rather forget it instead i
let it get the best of me
unnatural remedy
a recipe for some disaster
no empathy is left for me, breath is moving sharper
left inside a trench, my mind is fighting itself
desolate, i’m empty, i’m sick of finding help

[verse 3: mary sue]
yeah
you were sick of finding help
i was sick of finding h*ll
why i’m stuck to the bottom so i figured, “might as well”
told my demons i’m gon’ call them when my vices start [?]
when the past start to falter, and the passiveness is frail
craving for the green like i’m munching on some kale
desolate and stale
locked up in my mind, i never wanted you to bail
papa told me not to cry, cos’ i gotta be a male
expectations like a coffin, lotta pressure being nailed
feeling all these textures, hear the music like its braille
yeah, my soul is never up for sale
that’s why i never fail
yeah, my soul is never up for sale
why i never fail
my soul is never up for sale
why i never fail
sue, sue

- ridgy lyrics

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