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the perfect bathroom trip - rhett and link lyrics

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we live in a world full of dirty things
dirty doorkn-bs and atm machines
dirty cook sneezing on my chicken wings

so much dirty disease, we can’t keep our hands clean

public restrooms are a main concern
where the walls are painted with strangers’ urine
if they scribble on the wall of a bathroom stall
do you honestly think that they wash their hands after touchin’ their

all i’m makin’ is a simple suggestion
to have an exit plan next time you enter a restroom
i’m not concerned with your particular reason
be it ocd or just the upcoming cold and flu season
listen here

do your business
zip up and then dispense this
little bit a paper towel, but wait
turn on the tap, apply some soap
lather up, rinse, don’t stop the flow
first grab that paper towel you saved
use it as a barrier when touching the faucet area
and when getting more paper towels for your hands
dry with it, then retain it
for the doorkn-b may be tainted
as you exit, bank it off the wall into the trash can
it’s the perfect bathroom trip, man
it’s the perfect bathroom plan (it’s perfect)

do your business
zip up and then dispense this
little bit a paper towel, but wait
turn on the tap, apply some soap
lather up, rinse, don’t stop the flow
first grab that paper towel you saved
use it as a barrier when touching the faucet area
and when getting more paper towels for your hands
dry with it, then retain it
for the doorkn-b may be tainted
as you exit, bank it off the wall into the trash can
it’s the perfect bathroom trip, man
it’s the perfect bathroom plan (it’s perfect)
it’s the perfect bathroom trip

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