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don't slip on loose muesli - reeves and mortimer lyrics

don’t slip on loose muesli
don’t drink and sleep on a scree
hang back, clergy on a clifftop
don’t let your children run free

this is a beautiful story about a little lady called carol*anne

now carol*anne was doing all right
and she topped up her benefit money with
some work as a magician’s assistant

that’s right but it all went horridly wrong
when the amazing mr potty was sent to jail
and understandably poor carol*anne turned once again to gin

so one day in a drunked stupor and depressed
she took her young son franky to the edge of a cliff
overlooking the vale of pickering
and for a while the enjoyеd the view togethеr

but where was franky?

let me tell you
earlier that day a young clergyman came to
the self same spot to have his breakfast
and remembering a sermon by sir harry seacombe
his arm involentary jerked forward
and spilled loose muesli here, on this cliff top
now little franky approached the cliff edge cautiously
but the soles of his brothel creepers were to thick to
sense the loose muesli below his feet
he lost his grip, he began to fall
that’s right, the winds took him away by blowing his
little elvis presley costume over the edge of the cliff

he had no time to cry out
but ladies and gentleman
let me tell you, if he had have done
this is what he would have said:

don’t slip on loose muesli
don’t drink and sleep on a scree
take care clergy on a cliff top
don’t let your children run free

carol*anne kept on boozing
didn’t hear a word we said
got drunk on a clifftop
now little elvis is dead

don’t blame the clergyman
for leaving muesli on a mountain
the blame lies with carol*anne
she just lay back boozing

- reeves and mortimer lyrics

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