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the gemini - ray reaves lyrics

[intro]
i’m lost in my own mind
have contradicting thoughts at the same time
i don’t know who i am
i don’t know who i am
[verse 1]
the twisted mind of a gemini
half of me’s optimistic the other just wants to end my life
alter egos that live inside
wanting me to go get as high
as all those other kids who died
just chasing down that finish line
some days i wake up feeling like i’m the mvp
other days i start to envy peep, there’s no in-between
pop a pill, hope for endless sleep
won’t the end be sweet
but for real, i wanna live my dream
of a billion streams
and all those other brilliant things that rappers love
from packing clubs to smashing sl-ts
compensation for lack of love
p-ss the bud
me and my n-gg-s always be actin up
just masking up
the fact that i drown in internal aqueducts
crying for help
struggle with finding myself
claiming i’m grinding for wealth
i always lie to myself
i’m only doing this sh-t so i don’t feel useless as sh-t
i’m pitiful
using my gift to talk on the stupidest sh-t
that’s typical
writing this kinda song is so difficult
cuz i’m letting you n-gg-s know, i’m not quite as invincible
as the n-gg- i’ve been training y’all to see me as
i’m scared if y’all see me spazz, that can’t n-body bring me back
i’m a walking contradiction with a lotta pigment
i’ve been caught up in these women tryna dodge addiction
lots of sinning, liquor, and marijuana in him
wonder if this track could get god’s attention, he’s gotta listen
[hook]
i’m lost in my own mind
have contradicting thoughts at the same time
i don’t know who i am
i don’t know who i am
[verse 2]
but i’m used to this sh-t
writing this is therapeutic as sh-t
alway’s got something to prove when i spit
my music is lit but i’m doomed since a kid
i remember hearing views from the 6
that’s what drove my -ss to move to the 6
aubrey graham had helped me through all the sh-t
that should’ve k!lled me now i bloom in this b-tch
now my dreams are getting lucid, the kids in the zone
finna get rich as a b-tch on my own
i only wish i could feel less alone
while i’m writing these poems, whatever i’m grown
i want a girl who can help build a home
but i also want h-lla women to bone
i wanna a whip with some rims that are chrome
but i don’t want sh-t that expensive to own
i want the clout but i don’t want the shade
i wanna house to call home in la
but i don’t want droughts and i don’t want no quakes
and don’t wanna be fake but i wanna get paid
i want some peace, but i wanna riot
cuz i’m losing sleep at the thought of the violence
that’s k!lling my n-gg-s who won’t ever get to live
but if i k!ll a pig, aren’t i a hypocrite?

- ray reaves lyrics

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