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the descent of mr. noodles - randy prozac lyrics

johnny awoke, and when he looked up to the sky, he felt a sudden vertigo, as if he were staring downward into an abyss
he noticed it how cold it had become, he was freezing… his entire body was shaking
“here, have some gobstoppers, it’s starting to snow
i know you’re cold, but don’t worry, soon mr. noodles will be warming your heart!”
they walked towards the radiant light which now stood upon a hill set at the very peak of the black rock
“it’s getting colder, mister… how much further?”
“oh, not much further now… look! the light!
it’s much closer now than it was mere moments ago
i can see glorious rays coming from the light… do you see it?
it looks like a solitary cabin immersed in the icy fogs
he must be there… he must be!”
they walked further along a winding concentric pathway, moving closer and closer with each passing ring
sheets of ice had formed like walls along the path, transforming it into a labyrinth of opaque glass
johnny noticed there were the disconsolate shades within the ice
but the frost congealed his eyelids with frozen tears, locking them up again
as they trudged forward in slow circles, like snakes methodically climbing a pole, the winds howled around them
at long last, breathless from their endless ascent, chilled by the darkness and the cold
concealed within a curtain of night that knew no day, they reached the cabin
a grand lodge with a solitary light shining from a lone window
they walked along the frozen gateway towards the only door
candles that had been hanged from branches of dead trees slowly swayed in the winds
casting shadows that would skitter like mice in every direction along the walk
as they approached, they saw a gilded knocker set upon the door
it was made from brass, and forged into the shape of an owls’ eye
“look closely, there is a hole in the eye
can you look through the owl’s eye and see if mr. noodles is there?”
“i can’t do it, because what if he isn’t there?”
“if he isn’t there, i just couldn’t deal with it… not again… poor mr. noodles
no, i just can’t bring myself to do it, but you could, i believe in you and so does mr. noodles
both of us believe that you are the one who should look into the hole, so you really should do it
mr. noodles would be so disappointed if you didn’t
and you just might find yourself staring directly into his eyes if you do
imagine how wonderful that would be!
his eyes might be down there waiting for your eyes to see his eyes
his eyes, shining in the dark, so scared and alone, shivering and cold
his eyes would be smiling before they even saw you
smiling in the darkness! oh, wouldn’t that be the most magical moment? come on… go and look
if you don’t look, you might have to live with never having known what was there, just do it, it’s so easy
what if mr. noodles is in there? then we’d all have to live with your decision and i don’t know if i can do that… can you?”
johnny stood as tall as he could, his entire being shuddered as looked into the hole in the eye… he saw nothing
he opened his mouth to speak but all that came out was sparks and steel as an axe slammed into the back of his head
his final vision was of christmas lights, as his eyes went dead forever
he chopped and chopped until johnny was only the pieces of a broken jack*o’*lantern
a hissing sound resonated from the cranium… the sound of angered snakes
one final chop, and johnny’s brains spilled everywhere with clouds of steam
scooping them up in handfuls, he shovelled them into his mouth
swallowing, he could still taste the popsicles in johnny’s thoughts
with axe in hand he crossed through the doorway
all of johnny’s memories dribbled down his shiny wet throat as he mumbled
“mr. noodles… is that you? don’t be afraid
come out from the corner… no?
then i will come to you mr. noodles
let me join you in the corner
we’ll both make ourselves as tiny as we can
so tiny in the corner, tiny in the corner… what fun!
oh, there you are, where’d you go? there you are! hehe!
oh, mr. noodles, it’s so good to see you… we’re so tiny… we’re so tiny”

- randy prozac lyrics

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