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an occurence in the utah mountains - randall kirk jones lyrics

how’d i end up in this crippling situation
unable to cope with the smallest of changes
it’d become unhealthy and unsustainable
and all far too comfortable
and so much subtly eating at me
working in the background so i couldn’t see
how i’d built a defense against being sincere
til an occurrence in utah brought it front and center

trying to forget the train wreck i left back in texas
unaware of just how deeply i had been affected
but through this mountainous landscape
and what we snuck through the tsa
i finally woke up from this horrible state
i’d unknowingly slipped into
of mental traps i watched myself
set down then walk into

in the mirror i jumped back
from this bathroom intruder
this primitive animal
spruced up in patterned fabric
and anything else i am is a miracle
these two unusual states helped me to translate
an otherwise unreachable appreciation
for our completely ridiculous living situation

and i took this all with me on the plane back to dallas
this feeling that i can’t quite verbally distill
but from my window seat
the world looks completely still
as i watch the clouds making shadows on the hills
that world down there has no room to be taken seriously
a blip of life in uninhabitable blackness
and if that’s all it is
dear god what am i
a monkey in a sky bus
obsessed with making
meaning out of madness

- randall kirk jones lyrics

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