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dick pics - raccooneggs lyrics

[intro: racc–neggs and -aznstylez-]
-ayy, racc–n-
yeah?
-this… this song is about how you have an obssession with uhh… d-ck pics-
okay
-you could…-
-take it away, you go first…-
oh sh-t, okay… alright

[verse 1: racc–neggs]
it was my first day of middle school
i walked into the bathroom to take a leak
and i stepped into one of the two urinals
and somebody else was to my left
and i looked over and saw their d-ck and it was love at first sight
i was like “jesus christ, y’know, i’m not the only one on this sad cold earth that has one of those between their legs…”
“y’know, maybe this isn’t such a terrible world after all…”
and i reach over and put my hand on his shoulder and i said
“hey! you and me, y’know, we both have d-cks, do you wanna, like, exchange d-ck pics sometime?”
and he was like “f-ck yeah dawg, here’s my snap…”
later that day, i go home, i’m on the bus, y’know, i’m not even talking to my friends, i’m busy lookin’ at my phone
checking out all those amazing -ss d-ck pics he’s sendin’ me
and i just…
i can barely keep it together
i’m just so happy, take it away azn…

[chorus: aznstylez]
la-da-da-da-da, yeah
oh, yo
ooh, yah, ooh
send me your d-ck pics and let’s not focus on how old you are
i just need a quick nut in your face
send me your d-ck pics and let’s ride that hard -ss d-ck
i just need a quick nut in your face

[verse 2: aznstylez]
at times i wonder why i fool with you
but you are g-y for me, i am g-y for you
obviously, i didn’t wanna fall for it
gather my saliva, blow it all on you
so, don’t take advantage
don’t leave my f-cking d-ck out
and just suck on my d-ck
’til i f-ckin’ c-m all over on you, yeah

[chorus: aznstylez]
so won’t you send me your d-ck pics and let’s not focus on how old you are
i just need a quick nut in your, a quick nut in your face
send me your d-ck pics and let’s ride that hard -ss d-ck
i just need a quick nut in your face
take it away, racc–n

[verse 2: racc–neggs]
later that day, there i am, on my bed
i’m kickin’ my legs back and forth like an excited little girl
just lookin’ at my phone, just scrollin’ through all his d-ck pics that he sent me
my mom walks in my room and asks me what she’s-
what i’m doing and she sees my phone and she sees what i’m lookin’ at
and she says “jesus christ, what’re you doing, son?”
she takes my phone outta my hands and she confiscates it
all of a sudden i have no phone and i’m thrust back into the cold, cold, harsh reality of life, with no d-ck pics to keep me company…
i shake my head and a single tear falls down my cheek and it all seems hopeless
but then all of a sudden i hear a tap on my window
and i open it and it’s my friend that i met at the urinal…
and he hands me a print-out picture of his d-ck, and he says
“here you go, y’know, you don’t need a phone for that sh-t, alright? i’ve got you covered fam…”
i take that paper, i sn-tch it right up and i start lookin’ at those beautiful, beautiful pixels on that paper
and i say “you’re right, y’know? i don’t need a phone, you’re right”
“technology? i don’t need technology for a d-ck pic, this is all i really need”
and i say “yo, you got any more fam?”
and he’s like “yeah, sure thing, hold up, let me go to my car”
he opens his trunk, he pulls out a huge stack of files
f-ckin’ bigger than the dictionary…
he hauls all that sh-t up to my window, he throws it in, in a pile
it just f-ckin’ flies everywhere
sh-t looks like when those envelopes flew through the mail slot in the harry potter movies…
so, that’s how many d-ck pics i’ve got printed out now and i’m just lookin’ at them all one by one and i cannot contain my joy
my mom is not gonna be happy about this one, take it away azn…

[hook: aznstylez]
oooh, i take a look at my scr-pbook d-ck pics…
swipe, swipe, swipe
swipe on that f-ckin’ grindr
i just need a f-cking nut in your face…
swipe, swipe, swipe
swipe on that grindr
i just need a f-cking nut in your face…
la-da-da-da-da-da-da, yeah
ooooh
ride, ride, ride
come and ride that hard -ss d-ck, yeah
ooooh
-beatboxing-
doo-doo-doo-dah-dah-dah-dooo
ride that hard -ss d-ck
ride, ride, come and ride that d-ck

[outro: racc–neggs, -aznstylez-]
wow, that was…
that was something
azn, azn, if you had handed it back to me again
i’d say “my mom came in with a flamethrower, burned all the d-ck pics and then he got to me again my shining a picture of his d-ck in the sky like a bat-signal”…
-oh my god, so d-mn g-yyyy-

- raccooneggs lyrics

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