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if i had a rocket launcher - possible oscar lyrics

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if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
well, i’d pwn me some n00bs (i would pwn me some n00bs)
and if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
i’d pwn n00bs universally in games (not just in halo or in call of duty)
and if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
well, i’d beat all of my games (and probably some of your games as well)
and if i had a rocket launcher
i’d win at pong

if i had a rocket launcher (i wouldn’t have to cheat anymore)
if i had a rocket launcher (rocket fire would really even the score)
if i had a rocket launcher (maybe i could use a rocket to finally win at tetris someday)

you know, why do you have to always wait for that one long bar to eliminate four lines and get a tetris? why can’t you just eliminate everything on the screen with a well placed missile?
yeah, and since it’s a russian game, you can say something clever like…”dosvidanya, komrade.”

if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
well, i’d clear traffic in frogger (but not clear real traffic, that’s cruel)
and if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
well, i’d exterminate in centipede (yep, sauté mushrooms or that spider)
and if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
well, i’d win in john madden’s games (ooh, put some heat on my shotgun pass)
and if i had a rocket launcher
i’d fry q*bert!

if i had a rocket launcher (defeating pokémon isn’t hard)
if i had a rocket launcher (got me a heat seeking charizard)
if i had a rocket launcher (i wouldn’t have to use that blue sh*ll)
but we’d still use the blue sh*ll
of course we would
but we’d use the blue sh*ll to deflect the missiles
uh huh
or use the missiles to deflect the blue sh*ll
i just hate how when you’re in first place and you launch it you knock yourself out if first place

if i had a rocket launcher (instead of a fire flower)
well, i’d fry me a goomba (but not a real goomba, that’s cruel)
and if i had a rocket launcher (or the triforce of power)
well, i’d rescue the princess (peach, zelda or pauline)
and if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
well, i’d take out an ape named donkey (haven’t you always hated that monkey?)
and if i had a rocket launcher
i’d beat bowser!

if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
if i had a rocket launcher (if i had a rocket launcher)
you’d be dead

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