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this is me, air-drying my soggy knees. - pizza boy. lyrics

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[verse 1]
i wished my wit’s dryness matched your panties
i had to stop believing you’re for me, i had to give up trying to be mandy, ‘cause i’m f-cking billy: kind of stupid; silly
so if this straight sh-t fails again, then i’m f-cking billy
the first billy i find, his d-ck is mine
i guess i’ll see if that’s a sin whenever grim comes to get me
i’m joking, but yes, i’m socially disfigured, s-xually confused
catch me in some knickers, in the sheets dozing
madison montgomery-sparked wet dream
i ate her like her p-ssy was on the menu “limited time only”
told a tumblr feminist, “i’m like this ‘cause my mommy failed to hold me.”
no one consoles me, i’m consulting myself on matters
i know you’d love to call me jaleel white meets marshall mathers, not realizing i’m playing characters
i’m not your “nice guy”, nerd, or misogynist
i don’t think i’m ent-tled to sh-t; calm your t-ts

[hook]
we be reachin’ for a reason to say women be shoppin’
women be reachin’ for a reason to say we are oppressive
yes, i guess some days i figure i only want you for s-x
and some days i want you for your fire body of intellect
and i’m just sayin’
i agree your perspective isn’t respected
but before you tell me mine, i’ll like to explain myself
it’s like… like…
like, can i explain myself?
it’s like… like… like… like…

[verse 2]
this signal is mixed up; do i ask if you even want a mixed drink?
or do i just order you one in a big cup?
all of this room for a social hiccup
should i sit and yell at my d-ck just for existing?
facetious picking of straw from man
eggsh-ll slippers; maybe i should be off a zan…
i don’t want to offend
i don’t want to impose
i don’t want to pretend
i just want to be me; i’m told that’s a bad decision
what argument to side with, initiative or permission?
closed mouths don’t get fed, but i see you deal with d-ckheads pecking at your lips while you try to tell them to get lost, so i feel you
i’ll sit, lead in my shoes, fingertips treading these keys
you’re my woman crush wednesday, i’m eric bischoff

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