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nickelodeon girls - pink guy lyrics

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[intro]
(h-llo, nickelodeon headquarters)
hi, sorry to disturb you this late in the night
i have a serious inquiry directed toward nickelodeon
my question is what the f-ck are you doing?
you know y’all used to have some fire b-tches
when i turn on the tv i’m trying to see my favorite b-tches
zoey101? jennette mccurdy? oh my god
and now all you got is these preteens
bruh, i’m not a pedo
i’m not trying to look at these little kids and get aroused
now i can’t watch nickelodeon with my d-ck in my hand anymore
now i’m f-cking upset
this is some f-cking bullsh-t

[verse]
dan schneider
bring all my b-tches back
i need all my b-tches, i need all my b-tches
the new sh-t you put out is wack
dan schneider
i’m just trying to get an erection
but now that these kids looking 13 and under
my p-n-s will suffer

dan f-cking schneider (schneider)
this ain’t a f-cking game, b-tch
i wanna watch a sitcom
with my hand on my d-ck
i wanna see a t-tty (t-tty)
not f-cking kid sh-t
return all the hot chicks
or you gon get it b-tch

icarly, icarly
i don’t care if you look like michael jackson
as long as you giving me action
and freddy gon’ film the reaction
sam gonna join in
and suck me a fat one
nickelodeon girls
can’t live without ’em (whew)

ariana grande
i know i drive a hyundai
i can put you in a coma
have brunch on a sunday (fancy)
my d-ck put you in a coffin
all night screaming and tossing
victoria justice
i know you tryna touch this

lizzie mcguire is tight
but i bet zoey’s tighter
you can find me in her bed
digging through that vaginer
amanda bynes, you a little bit crazy
but you can still have my babies (whew)
go down like a dog with the rabies
y’all can’t save me

uh, a little bit of weed, hard liquor for the ladies
got me feeling like a young dan schneider from the 80’s
with a jewish law firm and an all black mercedes
she playing with the b-lls like brady (ay)
f-ck off with the sh-tty little kids with their stupid sh-t
i only wanna see the ones with a body fit
and i don’t want to be the one to be a little b-tch about it
but i’m just saying what everybody is thinking (hahahahaha)
where the t-tties at?
dan schneider why you ruining your business?
you realize i’d probably buy cable if you keep all the girls
and the ratings all stable
cuz i ain’t tryin to see a young baby in the cradle
cuz i’m not a pedophile
i’m not trying to see that sh-t (c’mon man)

the girls i have s-xualized are all in their 20’s and 30’s
(disclaimer!)
i’m not saying you should change all the b-tches
but at least something after 10:30 (30!)

dan schneider
bring all my b-tches back
i need all my b-tches, i need all my b-tches
i need all my b-tches back

i love you dan schneider, just please bring them back

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