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ashes - phix lyrics

[verse 1]
i’ve lost most my family and it’s not to death
my dad hopes i end up broken alone
decisions i made have me full of regret
can’t remember the last time he called on the phone
thought i found someone who made me forget
and i f*cked it all up by the time she got home
i needed some time to sit back and reflect
‘fore it too late for me and she’s already gone

[verse 2]
if i screamed out aloud lookin’ for help
who would really be there that would listen
i’ve been in places so dark i got used to the view
and my happiness really went missin’
until you at fault, you who they blame
but deep down you know that it isn’t
i’m not enthused to have to go and show you this place
but this is my life in a prison
[verse 3]
all the voices in my head i can’t get rid of
say that they are here to come and destroy me
how do i make a change in my life when they are the ones livin’ it for me
grab the gun out the case and aimed it at my face
and i stand there while drinkin’ a 40
for these motherf*ckers who look down on me
and think it’s stupid and corny
i neglected the fact and that i could express the way this depression changed me
i reflected inside of my head for so long and the fact that i’m still here is amazing
instead of the torment, i pressed the recorder and came out with something insane
and my mission is to end a connect with the people who claim they hate me

[verse 4]
now they wanna see me succeed, is that a facade?
what should i truly be down for this?
’cause we get lied to every day by the same people that seem to create our happiness
the universe puts us in each other’s lives for better or worst
i ain’t asked for this
and some of you want to watch the world burn down into ashes you m*s*ch*st
all of your bullsh*t is back for me
every time i call you out then it’s [?] for me
i know its not my fault but i’m always the one that is [?] feels like it has to be
i feel like there is something that’s after me
i am not sure what it was for me actually
i feel like i’m ’bout to revolve
the only dissolves
this is what’s happening
[verse 5]
when i bust through the doors bring my armies
and everyone standing attention and waiting
all my army know it be my [?] anyone standin’ in my way
is gonna catch me on a dark night
and i’m the joker like the [?]
need to call 9*1*1
ima need you to bring me a stretcher in
all of my friends think i’m wishy*washy cause i rather stay at home than get too sloppy
and if you hear this homie i’m really sorry
this is getting body
go and get the dolly
they just got fed up
that i would rather go stay at home and try to build a life
everytime i’m tryna get it right
’til that happens we blow up overnight

[verse 6]
i needed some time for recovery
now that i have a platform they wanna muzzle me, man
the industry is puzzelin’
one minute they want me dead and the next day they lovin’ me
i brought the people together like huddles be
tired of speaking in subtleties
but d*mn, young man, you done did it again
he looks good now, doesn’t he?
[instramental]

- phix lyrics

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