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society ladies - peter skellern lyrics

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when society ladies ask me to tea
oh, what a letdown i must be
they think i’m a star** how wrong they are
cos i’m no*one, no*one but me

when society ladies ask me to dine
they’re thrilled by eight, and bored by nine
they know something’s wrong** i’m not like the song
cos i’m no*one, no*one but me

they ask me to play the piah*no
which for my information’s an heirloom
the polish is stunning, the gold*plate it is running
and invariably out of tune

when society ladies show mе to their friends
they kiss my cheek, but that’s whеre it ends
for although i’m a name, it’s not quite the same
cos i’m no*one, no*one but me

[instrumental bridge]

i once fell in love with a girl from roedean
she was terribly cool, i was frightfully keen
i tried all my numbers to get up her jumpers
but nothing, nothing for me
i was once asked to play at a debutante’s ball
she said i was sweet, which means nothing at all
i asked her to dance, but i knew at a glance
i was no*one, no*one but me

they try very hard to be down to earth
and talk about things i should know
but after a time, they succumb to their wine
and their breeding begins to show

when society ladies ask me to lunch
i’m very honoured, but here comes the crunch
they’ve heard i was seen with their daughter last night
and they’d like to put me gently right
that although i am kind and unusually bright
i’ll never be mark phillips, try as i might
cos i’m no*one, no*one but me

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