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a starr is born - paul hodge lyrics

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[kenneth starr]
when you wish for kenneth starr
that’s “starr” with a double r
so when you wish for kenneth starr
a starr is born…

when i was just in high school back in texas
i was voted the “most likely to succeed”
and from an early age, i dreamt i’d be on stage
but my parents worried where that dream might lead
silly them!

so in college, then, i started learning law
i’ll admit, though, i don’t use it very much
’cause when your only aim is to get a bit of fame
you don’t really need it, as such

once a starr is born
yes, i am the quality
he’s just an amateur
you don’t care for policy
you only care for character
and boy, am i a character!
ha-ha-ha-ha

who care about healthcare?
it bores, it’s complex
you know what you want is
the dirt, the crimes, and s-x
and i’ll give you that
i’ll give you everything
yes! i’m a triple threat
i can act
i can dance
i can sing—
—lehandedly take down a president

oh. yes. oh…
a starr is born!
i’ll sniff him out
and strip him bare
and bang him about
and this is what i’ll wear!

to save our republic
i’ll take him by the crotch
and we’ll do it all in public
’cause you know you love to watch
it’s so good, it’s practically born!

everyone knows
what goes wrong entertains
and that’s why you’ll remember me
the thong and the chains[?]
so you can kiss his -ss goodbye!
for today
a
starr
is
born!

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